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SUMMARY: To be honest, I'm not quite sure what to put for a summary. I guess you could say that Clark and Lois talk about some of the kinds of stories that they write about - among other things. This comes from both their perspectives.
DISCLAIMER: I've been working on this song fic on and off for a while now, but finally got the inspiration to finish it. This isn't really based on any one episode. It's based on the Don Henley song of the same name.
Dirty Laundry - Don Henley
Dirty Laundry (Live version) - Don Henley
"I make my living off the Evening News
Just give me something-something I can use
People love it when you lose,
They love dirty laundry
I used to wonder why I even bother watching the evening news with Lois after a long day at work. She insists on watching it night after night. Most of the time the big story is some scandal involving a politician or something like that. I don't complain about it to her though because she always manages to come up with her own unique twist on it, then nine times out of ten it ends up on the front page of the Planet. Truth be told, however, I have another reason for not complaining that she doesn't know about. I noticed a while back that whenever she gets that great idea, her eyes light up and...well...maybe I shouldn't tell you the rest because I am a gentleman after all. Oh, what the heck. I'll tell you.
Lois Lane gets horny and I reap all the benefits.
I know that Clark doesn't really care to watch the evening news with me. After all, a lot of times it's what he's done as the Blur that makes the news after all. I used to wonder why he never complained about it. He told me once that it was because I come up with a lot of great ideas for stories. I think I've finally figured out the real reason why he doesn't complain about it. Whenever I tell him my latest idea, he gets this gleam in his eyes and pulls me onto his lap. Now maybe I shouldn't tell you the rest because I am a lady after all. Oh, what the hell. I'll tell you. You're bound to find out anyway.
Clark Kent gets horny and I reap all the benefits.
Well, I coulda been an actor, but I wound up here
I just have to look good, I don't have to be clear
Come and whisper in my ear
Give us dirty laundry
I know that sometimes Lois gets a little jealous when we go out to interview a source and the person turns out to be a stunningly gorgeous woman. She thinks that I go out of my way to flirt with them just to make her jealous. Would you believe that? She would never admit to being jealous though. I've even had sources tell me that I should have been an actor instead of a reporter because I'm so drop-dead gorgeous. Well I think that's just plain silly. Me? An actor? Who would want to see me on the big screen anyway? Most of the time, these so-called 'actors' don't even know how to act. It seems like the only requirement is that they look good. Yet I'll still go to the movies because I get to sit in the back row and make out with my sexy girlfriend. I know she loves it when I place my hand on her thigh and slowly glide it under her skirt towards those lace panties. It's even better when she goes commando.
I just love going to the movies.
I know that Clark sometimes gets a little jealous when I have to interview some drop-dead gorgeous guy for a story. He denies it of course. He claims he doesn't get jealous, but I know better. So sometimes I flirt a little just to see the expression on his face. I know it's probably not nice, but I just can't help myself sometimes.
Would you believe that some of his sources have told him he should be an actor because he's too gorgeous to be a reporter? Sounds crazy doesn't it? I will admit that the thought of seeing my very sexy boyfriend on the silver screen is enough to make my temperature rise. So when we go to the movies, I always make sure that we sit in the back row so I can make out with my hunky farm boy. What he also doesn't know is that I wear those short skirts on purpose because I know that in due time he'll place his hand on my thigh and glide it up towards my lace panties. Sometimes when I'm in a naughty mood, I just might go commando.
I just love going to the movies.
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em all around
I don't believe in kicking a person when they're down. I was not raised that way - yet there are plenty of people who will do just that and it just drives me crazy sometimes. It makes me so proud to be with a woman who has compassion for people. That's one of the many things I love about her.
Her humanity.
I agree with Clark completely when he talks about not wanting to knock a person when they're down in the dumps. He has such compassion and respect for human life. I am so proud to be with a man like Clark. That's one of the many things I love about him.
His humanity.
We got the bubble-headed-bleach-blonde who comes on at five
She can tell you 'bout the plane crash with a gleam in her eye
It's interesting when people die-
Give us dirty laundry
There's this new anchor woman on the five o'clock news. I just don't understand what possessed the television station to hire someone like her. Now normally I would never go for the stereotypical notion of a blonde being a bubble-head, but I'll make an exception in this case. She definitely is a bubble-head most of the time. However, I have to say I was quite shocked the other night when she announced a horrific plane crash with what I could best describe as a gleam in her eye. Over one hundred people were killed and this is her reaction? How could she just sit there and calmly deliver such tragic news and not show the slightest bit of compassion?
I just don't understand people sometimes.
I was listening to an eighties music retrospective on the radio the other day when one of the d-jays interrupted the program to announce that there was a plane crash and over one hundred people were killed. I immediately went into the living room and found Clark sitting on the couch already watching the news. He kept muttering to himself about how the anchorwoman was such a bubble-head. Now it's unusual for Clark to be openly critical like that. I was all set to defend her when I saw the gleam in her eyes as she continued to read the report. She was so calm and emotionless. It was definitely unnerving.
I just don't understand people sometimes.
Can we film the operation?
Is the head dead yet?
You know, the boys in the newsroom got a
running bet
Get the widow on the set!
We need dirty laundry
I usually love being a reporter, but there are some days I wish I wasn't one. The state of Florida was about to execute a man who was convicted of killing three members of his own family. Lois and I were sent to try and get an interview with the man's wife before he was put to death. I'm opposed to the death penalty, so having to cover this story was not going to be easy for me. I tried to convince Mr. White to take me off it, but he wouldn't hear of it. I even heard a rumor that everybody back at the bullpen had a running bet as to who would actually get the interview.
Would you believe it was Lois?
I just love being a reporter. There isn't one day that I wish I wasn't one. You never know when a juicy story will fall into your lap. When Mr. White assigned Clark and I the Florida story, I was so excited about it, but I know that Clark wasn't too thrilled. I know he's opposed to the death penalty and doesn't like the fact that I'm for it. We've had a few arguments about it, but we finally agreed to disagree. I found out from a reliable source that he tried to get Mr. White to assign it to somebody else, but he wasn't convincing enough. My source also revealed that everyone in the bullpen had a running bet on who would get the interview.
Would you believe it was me?
You don't really need to find out what's going on
You don't really want to know just how far it's gone
Just leave well enough alone
Eat your dirty laundry
Some people just want to bury their heads in the sand rather than deal with reality. I confess I was one of those people when it came to Lana. All the years I wasted believing that she was the one for me. I didn't want to admit to myself that we just weren't compatible. Why else would we constantly break up and get together? I'm sure that even our closest friends got sick of the Clark and Lana drama after a while - or as Chloe puts it - Clana.
I confess that I never thought in a million years that the woman I believed to be bossy, stuck-up, and rude would end up being my true soul mate. Chloe told me she knew when I got dunked in the dunk tank during senior year that Lois was the one for me. She said I couldn't stop smiling at her. Who knew?
Apparently everybody.
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're stiff
Kick 'em all around
Clark is the kind of person who won't give up on anyone - especially Lana. That relationship should have ended a long, long time ago. I never understood what he saw in her. Sure she was pretty and smart, but there just always seemed to be something missing. He just never wanted to dig deeper and see the real Lana Lang. Now I'm not saying she's a bad person mind you - but when something is not working, then you need to admit to yourself that there's nothing more you can do.
I confess that I never thought in a million years that the plaid-loving farm boy who has a love affair with the colors red and blue would end up being my soul mate. Chloe told me she knew when I dunked Clark in the dunk tank during senior year that Clark was the one for me. She said I couldn't stop smiling at him. Who knew?
Apparently everybody.
Dirty little secrets
Dirty little lies
We got our dirty little fingers in everybody's pie
We love to cut you down to size
We love dirty laundry
We all have our dirty little secrets. I know I've had a few of them. I don't know if my being an I.T. (Intergalactic Traveler) counts as one, but I'm sure Lex probably would. Now there's a man who's had a million of them. You should hear about how many he has. I would be writing from now until infinity and that would only be the tip of the iceberg. I find it ironic that he quote *died* unquote because the equivalent of an iceberg fell on him. I know I should refer to him in the past tense - but knowing Lex, he's probably still alive. Besides, Dr. Fate did tell me that I would eventually defeat him.
If anybody can come back from the dead, it's Lex.
I admit that I always knew that Clark had his own share of secrets, but I never knew that him not being human was one of them. In my mind, I don't think of him as an alien. Scratch that. Intergalactic traveler. He doesn't like the term alien. I can't say I blame him because there's still a negative connotation when you hear the term alien. He told me that the reason he didn't tell me until now was because he wanted to protect me. Protect me from what? I'm always sticking my nose where it doesn't belong. So when he finally told me, I confess I was really upset that I was the last to find out. Then he told me that I was the only one he ever willingly told. I have to say that was one of the most wonderful things he could have told me. So I felt that revealing such a big secret deserved revealing one of my own. So I told him I loved him - and he said it back. Then I found out another one of Clark's dirty little secrets.
He can give a girl multiple orgasms.
We can do "The Innuendo"
We can dance and sing
When it's said and done we haven't told you a thing
We all know that Crap is King
Give us dirty laundry!
Until recently, Lois was under the mistaken assumption that I couldn't dance. Well I showed her all right. I might not be able to dance like Fred Astaire or Ginger Rogers, but I can certainly dance like Patrick Swayze. Okay, maybe not exactly like him, but close enough. I have to say that Lois was more than pleasantly surprised when I put on the Dirty Dancing soundtrack and pulled her into my arms.
We dirty danced all night - and I'm not talking about actual dancing.
I love it when Clark and I go to Karaoke night at the Talon. Those are the only times when I get to hear Clark Kent sing. He always pretends to put up a fight - but he knows that if he agrees to it, then he'll get a special surprise when we get home.
I put on that Dirty Dancing soundtrack and we dance all night - and I'm not talking about actual dancing.
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
I can't believe I started talking about the kinds of stories Lois and I write about - then end up talking about our own dirty little secrets.
I don't find it hard to believe that I started talking about the stories that Clark and I write about and end up talking about our own dirty little secrets.
Isn't that always the way?
DISCLAIMER: I've been working on this song fic on and off for a while now, but finally got the inspiration to finish it. This isn't really based on any one episode. It's based on the Don Henley song of the same name.
Dirty Laundry - Don Henley
Dirty Laundry (Live version) - Don Henley
"I make my living off the Evening News
Just give me something-something I can use
People love it when you lose,
They love dirty laundry
I used to wonder why I even bother watching the evening news with Lois after a long day at work. She insists on watching it night after night. Most of the time the big story is some scandal involving a politician or something like that. I don't complain about it to her though because she always manages to come up with her own unique twist on it, then nine times out of ten it ends up on the front page of the Planet. Truth be told, however, I have another reason for not complaining that she doesn't know about. I noticed a while back that whenever she gets that great idea, her eyes light up and...well...maybe I shouldn't tell you the rest because I am a gentleman after all. Oh, what the heck. I'll tell you.
Lois Lane gets horny and I reap all the benefits.
I know that Clark doesn't really care to watch the evening news with me. After all, a lot of times it's what he's done as the Blur that makes the news after all. I used to wonder why he never complained about it. He told me once that it was because I come up with a lot of great ideas for stories. I think I've finally figured out the real reason why he doesn't complain about it. Whenever I tell him my latest idea, he gets this gleam in his eyes and pulls me onto his lap. Now maybe I shouldn't tell you the rest because I am a lady after all. Oh, what the hell. I'll tell you. You're bound to find out anyway.
Clark Kent gets horny and I reap all the benefits.
Well, I coulda been an actor, but I wound up here
I just have to look good, I don't have to be clear
Come and whisper in my ear
Give us dirty laundry
I know that sometimes Lois gets a little jealous when we go out to interview a source and the person turns out to be a stunningly gorgeous woman. She thinks that I go out of my way to flirt with them just to make her jealous. Would you believe that? She would never admit to being jealous though. I've even had sources tell me that I should have been an actor instead of a reporter because I'm so drop-dead gorgeous. Well I think that's just plain silly. Me? An actor? Who would want to see me on the big screen anyway? Most of the time, these so-called 'actors' don't even know how to act. It seems like the only requirement is that they look good. Yet I'll still go to the movies because I get to sit in the back row and make out with my sexy girlfriend. I know she loves it when I place my hand on her thigh and slowly glide it under her skirt towards those lace panties. It's even better when she goes commando.
I just love going to the movies.
I know that Clark sometimes gets a little jealous when I have to interview some drop-dead gorgeous guy for a story. He denies it of course. He claims he doesn't get jealous, but I know better. So sometimes I flirt a little just to see the expression on his face. I know it's probably not nice, but I just can't help myself sometimes.
Would you believe that some of his sources have told him he should be an actor because he's too gorgeous to be a reporter? Sounds crazy doesn't it? I will admit that the thought of seeing my very sexy boyfriend on the silver screen is enough to make my temperature rise. So when we go to the movies, I always make sure that we sit in the back row so I can make out with my hunky farm boy. What he also doesn't know is that I wear those short skirts on purpose because I know that in due time he'll place his hand on my thigh and glide it up towards my lace panties. Sometimes when I'm in a naughty mood, I just might go commando.
I just love going to the movies.
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em all around
I don't believe in kicking a person when they're down. I was not raised that way - yet there are plenty of people who will do just that and it just drives me crazy sometimes. It makes me so proud to be with a woman who has compassion for people. That's one of the many things I love about her.
Her humanity.
I agree with Clark completely when he talks about not wanting to knock a person when they're down in the dumps. He has such compassion and respect for human life. I am so proud to be with a man like Clark. That's one of the many things I love about him.
His humanity.
We got the bubble-headed-bleach-blonde who comes on at five
She can tell you 'bout the plane crash with a gleam in her eye
It's interesting when people die-
Give us dirty laundry
There's this new anchor woman on the five o'clock news. I just don't understand what possessed the television station to hire someone like her. Now normally I would never go for the stereotypical notion of a blonde being a bubble-head, but I'll make an exception in this case. She definitely is a bubble-head most of the time. However, I have to say I was quite shocked the other night when she announced a horrific plane crash with what I could best describe as a gleam in her eye. Over one hundred people were killed and this is her reaction? How could she just sit there and calmly deliver such tragic news and not show the slightest bit of compassion?
I just don't understand people sometimes.
I was listening to an eighties music retrospective on the radio the other day when one of the d-jays interrupted the program to announce that there was a plane crash and over one hundred people were killed. I immediately went into the living room and found Clark sitting on the couch already watching the news. He kept muttering to himself about how the anchorwoman was such a bubble-head. Now it's unusual for Clark to be openly critical like that. I was all set to defend her when I saw the gleam in her eyes as she continued to read the report. She was so calm and emotionless. It was definitely unnerving.
I just don't understand people sometimes.
Can we film the operation?
Is the head dead yet?
You know, the boys in the newsroom got a
running bet
Get the widow on the set!
We need dirty laundry
I usually love being a reporter, but there are some days I wish I wasn't one. The state of Florida was about to execute a man who was convicted of killing three members of his own family. Lois and I were sent to try and get an interview with the man's wife before he was put to death. I'm opposed to the death penalty, so having to cover this story was not going to be easy for me. I tried to convince Mr. White to take me off it, but he wouldn't hear of it. I even heard a rumor that everybody back at the bullpen had a running bet as to who would actually get the interview.
Would you believe it was Lois?
I just love being a reporter. There isn't one day that I wish I wasn't one. You never know when a juicy story will fall into your lap. When Mr. White assigned Clark and I the Florida story, I was so excited about it, but I know that Clark wasn't too thrilled. I know he's opposed to the death penalty and doesn't like the fact that I'm for it. We've had a few arguments about it, but we finally agreed to disagree. I found out from a reliable source that he tried to get Mr. White to assign it to somebody else, but he wasn't convincing enough. My source also revealed that everyone in the bullpen had a running bet on who would get the interview.
Would you believe it was me?
You don't really need to find out what's going on
You don't really want to know just how far it's gone
Just leave well enough alone
Eat your dirty laundry
Some people just want to bury their heads in the sand rather than deal with reality. I confess I was one of those people when it came to Lana. All the years I wasted believing that she was the one for me. I didn't want to admit to myself that we just weren't compatible. Why else would we constantly break up and get together? I'm sure that even our closest friends got sick of the Clark and Lana drama after a while - or as Chloe puts it - Clana.
I confess that I never thought in a million years that the woman I believed to be bossy, stuck-up, and rude would end up being my true soul mate. Chloe told me she knew when I got dunked in the dunk tank during senior year that Lois was the one for me. She said I couldn't stop smiling at her. Who knew?
Apparently everybody.
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're stiff
Kick 'em all around
Clark is the kind of person who won't give up on anyone - especially Lana. That relationship should have ended a long, long time ago. I never understood what he saw in her. Sure she was pretty and smart, but there just always seemed to be something missing. He just never wanted to dig deeper and see the real Lana Lang. Now I'm not saying she's a bad person mind you - but when something is not working, then you need to admit to yourself that there's nothing more you can do.
I confess that I never thought in a million years that the plaid-loving farm boy who has a love affair with the colors red and blue would end up being my soul mate. Chloe told me she knew when I dunked Clark in the dunk tank during senior year that Clark was the one for me. She said I couldn't stop smiling at him. Who knew?
Apparently everybody.
Dirty little secrets
Dirty little lies
We got our dirty little fingers in everybody's pie
We love to cut you down to size
We love dirty laundry
We all have our dirty little secrets. I know I've had a few of them. I don't know if my being an I.T. (Intergalactic Traveler) counts as one, but I'm sure Lex probably would. Now there's a man who's had a million of them. You should hear about how many he has. I would be writing from now until infinity and that would only be the tip of the iceberg. I find it ironic that he quote *died* unquote because the equivalent of an iceberg fell on him. I know I should refer to him in the past tense - but knowing Lex, he's probably still alive. Besides, Dr. Fate did tell me that I would eventually defeat him.
If anybody can come back from the dead, it's Lex.
I admit that I always knew that Clark had his own share of secrets, but I never knew that him not being human was one of them. In my mind, I don't think of him as an alien. Scratch that. Intergalactic traveler. He doesn't like the term alien. I can't say I blame him because there's still a negative connotation when you hear the term alien. He told me that the reason he didn't tell me until now was because he wanted to protect me. Protect me from what? I'm always sticking my nose where it doesn't belong. So when he finally told me, I confess I was really upset that I was the last to find out. Then he told me that I was the only one he ever willingly told. I have to say that was one of the most wonderful things he could have told me. So I felt that revealing such a big secret deserved revealing one of my own. So I told him I loved him - and he said it back. Then I found out another one of Clark's dirty little secrets.
He can give a girl multiple orgasms.
We can do "The Innuendo"
We can dance and sing
When it's said and done we haven't told you a thing
We all know that Crap is King
Give us dirty laundry!
Until recently, Lois was under the mistaken assumption that I couldn't dance. Well I showed her all right. I might not be able to dance like Fred Astaire or Ginger Rogers, but I can certainly dance like Patrick Swayze. Okay, maybe not exactly like him, but close enough. I have to say that Lois was more than pleasantly surprised when I put on the Dirty Dancing soundtrack and pulled her into my arms.
We dirty danced all night - and I'm not talking about actual dancing.
I love it when Clark and I go to Karaoke night at the Talon. Those are the only times when I get to hear Clark Kent sing. He always pretends to put up a fight - but he knows that if he agrees to it, then he'll get a special surprise when we get home.
I put on that Dirty Dancing soundtrack and we dance all night - and I'm not talking about actual dancing.
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
Kick 'em when they're up
Kick 'em when they're down
I can't believe I started talking about the kinds of stories Lois and I write about - then end up talking about our own dirty little secrets.
I don't find it hard to believe that I started talking about the stories that Clark and I write about and end up talking about our own dirty little secrets.
Isn't that always the way?
I loved your alternating POVs. 
Nice one-shot, Mary.
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