All Or Nothing..........

[SmallvilleMan]

Rated: PG-13
Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Yes, I said my last story would be my last, but I couldn't get this story out of my head and i'm hoping it will be a quick short one with only 5 or 6 updates.

Summary: This takes place basically before Siren........Everything else happened, etc......

Facing the Truth

He wasn't sure how it had come to this. How they had always seemingly gone from the clouds to all the way to the ground. It just didn't seem fair at all, like anything had ever been for him. Except this time was different from all the other times. This time it wasn't about secrets or lies. This time it wasn't about protecting the person you loved from one Luther or the other Luther. This time it wasn't about leaving for Paris or how you ran away for the summer to forget the pain. This time there was no witch haunting you from the past or that father who tried to take away your love. No, this time, it was just about them and them alone.

As he held an old picture of them together in his hand and thought about all the good times, no matter how short they were, he couldn't help but smile. But sadly, those days were gone, further gone then he had thought and maybe it was fault. Then again, she as the one who had changed so much. Although, what did it matter whose fault it was anymore? Maybe that was their problems, always searching to blame themselves for problems or looking to one another, instead of just trying to fix the problem.

That's exactly why he was doing this, to fix the problem, but he also knew that maybe it couldn't be fixed. Either they were going to be closer than ever or it was going to be over.

“Uh oh, it's cloudy outside, should I be wary of Clark's double?” Chloe joked, sensing Clark could use some of that, no matter how lame it was. Clark put on a half-smile as he approached Chloe's desk. “Ah, the famous Clark Kent I'm just being polite smile. Something on your mind big guy?” Chloe ironically asked, already knowing what was on his mind, not like anyone else who was ever in love couldn't.

“I just wanted to inform you that me and Lana are going to Paris.” Clark blurted out as Chloe got that deer in the headlights look.

“Maybe I do need some that sunlight.” Chloe backed away a little bit as she got that deja vu type feeling. “Please tell me something reassuring so I know that I'm looking at the real Clark.” Chloe was quite serious in saying that.

“Ok, if i recall, the first time we met you tripped in the hallway and right at my feet. Is that enough evidence for you?” Clark said, taking a trip down memory lane. Chloe quickly looked around, hoping that no one else hear that.

“Good enough, now never let us speak of that moment again.” Chloe paused, mostly to regain her pride back. “So, then why are you following in your bizarro self's plan?” Chloe wondered.

“Because this is what needs to be done. We'll be gone for a week and I was hoping you pass the word along to Ollie. Just in case anything happens.” Clark got up about to leave, when Chloe stood up and got in his way.

“That's it? Just a I'm going to Paris Chloe go tell my other super powered buddy that i'm leaving? Clark, what the heck is going on?” Chloe was now concerned. Clark looked reluctantly away. “Come on, it's just me here.” Chloe warmly offered to listen.

“It's just kind of hard to say. Hard to admit actually, that I'm doing this, that it has come to this.” Clark looked on dejectedly.

“Wow, now I'm just really lost. It's hard to say that you're going to Paris with the girl you love? Can I get a lifeline here?” Chloe threw up her hands and Clark nodded.

“The reason I'm doing this is, because we just can't survive the path we've been on the past few weeks. It's like we don't know each other. Every moment has been awkward and just plain frustrating. I'm angry and she's upset, it just is tearing us apart. I can't stand by anymore and just watch us slowly drift away. So I decided to book a trip to Paris and it isn't just to relax or get away from our problems, it is to face them. One way or another we're going to face each other and hopefully we'll come back stronger than ever or it will truly be over.” Clark said with confused and hesitant filled eyes.

“Clark, that's...........Are you sure you want to do this? You guys have survived so much together and to risk it all on one week in Paris, seems a little rash.” Chloe said with concern.

“I know......It does, but I just don't see another way. This isn't just something we can fix with a magic wand, because I opt for that instead. The only way we're going to make it, is if we do it this way. I know that, in my heart.” Clark seemed convinced and that was enough for Chloe.

“Then I guess all I can say is, good luck. I'm rooting for you guys.” Chloe sincerely told him and embraced Clark into a hug.

She had decided to make it an early night as she walked into their room to change into her clothes. For the past week, walking into this room felt like walking into a nightmare as she relived what happened with, with well, whatever you want to call him. There stood the bed where she did more than give away her body to him, she gave him a piece of her, a piece that only belonged to Clark. That's what hurt the most and made her betrayal so much more.

The sad thing she had no idea what to do about it. She had tried in so many ways to say she was sorry, but there's some things you just can't apologize for. The look in his eyes when he would turn to her had said enough to know how what happened made him feel and how he questioned how she could have not known it was him. Not to mention the strain it was causing on their relationship as it headed down the same road it went before, except this time there would be no going back and no secret to blame, just themselves or just her.

Lana opened the closet to find her nightgown, but also noticed the lack of much else. “What the?” Lana looked around confused, until she noticed a couple of bags.

“I took the liberty of doing all the packing while you were gone today.” Lana turned around to find Clark in the doorway with a polite look on his face.

“I didn't realize we were going anywhere.” Lana hinted at wanting to know what was going on.

“Neither did I, until today.” Clark confessed as now Lana was more confused than she was when she found her closet near empty.

“So, are you going to make me guess.” Lana looked on, waiting for an answer as to where they were going.

“I booked a flight for Paris. We leave tomorrow and come back a week from then.”

“Paris?” Lana questioned, happy for a second before realizing what Paris had now signifyed for her. “Clark, is this because of what happened?” Lana cautiously asked him.

“Not just because of what happened, but because of everything.” Clark paused to gather his thoughts. “Listen, we'll have along flight to talk about it tomorrow. Ok?” Clark walked to Lana gave her a kiss on the cheek. “I love you.” He whispered, before he walked out as looked lost.

[SVsleuth]

Keep going, keep going....

Sounds like a wonderful idea, Harry. Bold of him to pick Paris, of all places. I can't wait to see what happens on the trip.

PPMS!

[basketballstar23]

i'm way excited to see where this goes. it seems amazing already! ppms! :)

[Clana227]

Hey I want to defienately hear more of this.
PPMS

[SmallvilleMan]

The Flight

The ride to the airport was a quiet one as they both were at a lack of words. Clark didn't know what he was going to say, didn't know what how he was going to approach the plan that made for this trip. After all, how else could you approach the simple of fact of just opening up to the girl you love, other then well, just opening up. But then again, where to start was the question. There was so much that he had kept to himself over the years with all the secrets and things that have happened that she had never known about. In addition to the fact, there were still some things that she had done, that he needed to voice an opinion on. Which most certainly would include the past month. Something that was eating at him inside and if he didn't get it out, he just might explode. Now was the time. Clark glanced slightly toward Lana as he came up to the exit for the airport.

Lana caught Clark's glance from the corner of her eye. She had hoped to get something out of him during the car ride as her curiosity was now peaked to the point of her wanting to burst. What was going on here? She asked herself the entire time. Of course it seems like a foolish question for a girl who was going to a place she loved with the man that she loved. She should be off the walls excited and showing the man she loved how much she appreciated this, but something stopped her. Maybe it was the painfully obviousness of the situation that stopped her from showing Clark with love now. Why would he do this after what happened? After we just spent the pass week in stone cold awkwardness and the look he's had in his eyes. The look that she had seen too many times before. The one that he had two years ago after his father died and when he told her that he didn't love her anymore. She hated that look, because it broke her heart and had always signified the end.

The silence between the two had continued through the trip through the airport. Until finally, they were able to board the plane to France. Clark had arranged for them to be in first class, thus trying to eliminate any other distraction besides from the obvious ones consuming their minds.

Clark being the gentlemen that he is, allowed Lana to slip into the window seat and he placed their bags in the storage compartments. After doing so, Clark took the seat next her and stole a glance at Lana. “First class, huh?” Lana finally broke this silence, but keeping her eyes out the window.

“Yeah, this was a trip that I planned on sparing no expense. For the first time in our live, I wasn't going to make money an issue.” Clark flatly explained as now Lana's curiosity was about to blow through the earth. However, she wasn't about to ask. She had already made enough mistakes.

“Oh, sounds good.” Lana smiled weakly.

Clark noticed her look and thought for a couple seconds before finally deciding that he couldn't wait any longer. “Lana, there's a special reason why I wanted to take this trip with you and why I kept it a secret.” Clark paused, still having trouble just saying it.

“Come on Clark, don't stop now.” Lana urged, desperately wanting an answer to this question that was driving her nuts since last night.

“The truth is that I can tell we're losing each other and to be truthful, I realize that it's both our faults.” Clark paused again. “But at the same time I have to hold you accountable for things that you've done and I think you can agree that I've never really done that. I've always been the kind of person to hold things back and this couldn't be a worse time to do that.” Clark took a deep breath before concluding his explanation. “And it's hard to say this, but I know that we'll either love each more than we ever have or we'll be torn apart for good.” Clark kept eye contact with Lana as he finished as he tried to gage her reaction.

“I really don't know what to say.” Lana's said with a shocked expression.

“I understand, luckily this a very long flight and we have a long time to think about everything that we want to say.” Clark smiled weakly before slowly turning away as Lana looked on.

The flight didn't prove to be as long as the time distance had suggested it was. A common occurrence when you have something as important as trying to save your relationship suddenly on your mind. It seems as if the seconds turned minutes and the minutes turned to hours. When Clark and Lana finally got off the plane, Lana managed to sneak away a few minutes as Clark waited on their luggage to arrive.

“Dailey Planet you tell it, we break it, Chloe Sullivan speaking.” Lana rolled her eyes at the greeting.

“You think you could have given me a little heads up on that my relationship with the man I love was going to be on the line this week.” Lana said with an irratated tone as Chloe sighed expecting the call.

“Well, you know Clark, he can keep secrets with the best of them. If I had known before the night he told you, then I would have been able to do something, but he didn't.” Chloe replied as she typed away on her computer.

“I feel like I just got bombared and I don't know what to do.” Lana paused and closed her eyes. “I'm afraid Chloe.” Lana whispered as Chloe stopped typing, seemingly searching for words of inspiration.

“What's there to be afraid of? He's still in love with you Lana, it isn't like you're playing in a league with a lot of other competition. Clark was only seen one girl in his entire life and that has been you. To be honest, I don't see the bad here.” Chloe tried to calm Lana down.

“Except for the fact that I got the feeling on the plane that he was going to rip me apart of the past month and before that. Not that I can blame him for that, if i could duplicate myself, the first thing my twin self would do is kick my own butt for what happened. It's just that I don't know how much more I can take of him being disappointed in me and looking at me like I'm a failure to him.” Lana winced at the thought.

“The way I can see it, is that you can look at in one of two ways. The first way being the one you so eloquantly mentioned or you can put yourself back in two years ago mode and remember all the bone headed moves that he pulled off during his years of trying to decide if he could tell you his secret.” Chloe suggested.

“Great, so then we can have a week long trip of yelling at each and then can top it off with breaking up. Sounds like fun, where do I sign up?” Lana mocked Chloe's suggestion.

“Normally that would case and if this were any other relationship that would be the case for major heartbreak on both sides. However, just like Smallville isn't a normal town, you two aren't the normal couple. I don't think you two have ever had the normal fight where you've gotten everything out and just let it all hang out, so maybe that wouldn't be a bad thing. Anyways, listen, he brought you here to save your relationship and I know you want to do the same thing. The best advice I can give you, is to do just that, whatever it takes. You know that I'll be rooting for you guys, so good luck and I love you both.” Chloe offered all she could in support before hanging up.

“LANA?” Clark yelled from the baggage claim as he looked around for Lana, who snapped out of her trance of deep thought from Chloe's phone call and raised her hands so Clark could see her.

“Sorry I took so long.” Lana apologized to Clark, who simply nodded knowingly.

“I hope you told her hi for me.” Lana looked guilty at Clark's comment. “I guess I know you a little better than you think.” Clark said as Lana gulped painfully at the comment as if it were a slight insult. Then they continued to the exit where their was a limo driver with a Mr. And Mrs. Kent sign.

“Mr. and Mrs. Kent?” Lana looked curiously up at Clark who shrugged.

“I just wanted to see what it felt like, just in case it never happens.” Clark responded. Lana stopped as if not sure how to take that.

The lim driver took all their bags into the car and opened the door for them to enter the limo. The limo included a bottle of champagne and some flowers, which were Lana's favorites.

“Oh my God, Clark, I just don't know what to say right now. This is all so great, but it also feels like you're just fullfilling my last wish before death row.” Lana expressed hestiantly.

“For both of us Lana, for both us.” Clark said echoing her thoughts and they both shared a long stare before Clark broke it. “I made reservations at the Taillevent tonight. I figured that would be a good place to begin our talk.” Clark informed Lana and she nodded.

[basketballstar23]

another fantastic update svm! I like this clark and I also like how lana is crazy weird
like in the show lol. ppms!

[Nemu]

man i hope Clark will lighten up a little... yeah they have to have a serious talk... but that was heavy...

PPMS!!!

[The Black Cat]

Very good so far. PPMS!

[basketballstar23]

hello? anybody here? or am i the only one feeling like i'm the only one here lol on this whole board. kinda weird lol anyways. looking forward to an update as always. very stoked to see where this is going :)

[kentfamily]

Great start please continue.;);)

[SVsleuth]

Just caught that last update. Te tension is building. Hoping for more soon. Gotta see how the talking goes. PPMS, Harry. :)

[SmallvilleMan]

Thank you everyone......

Reliving the Moment

The awkward silence had once again overcome their presence as they had laid in the hotel room. Clark had decided to rest on his bed, eyes closed as Lana sat ou on the balcony of their room. Although, this was the same awkward silence that they had been use to or the same one that overcomes most people. Instead, it rivaled that of a volcano. The usually quiet volcano, sitting there in silence as one stares at it, however, what's going on inside is totally different. Inside, the hot lava burns, quietly sneaking closer and closer to the edge until it erupts. Eruption was scheduled for seven.

Lana peared out into the balcony, remembering just how beautiful Paris was and as she did that, she remembered something else. She had remembered how he let her leave and didn't even say goodbye. How he had invited her to dinner with something to tell her, but back out. A theme that would continue for another couple of years with him. The hurt she had felt back then had suddenly come back to her and she turned her head slightly toward the window. She gave a small glare toward Clark as he laid there peacefully.

As she looked at him, another thought came to her mind. She had never seen Clark like this. He seemed so different right now, then the man she had always known or believed to have known. There was this strange sense of confidence and yet detachment in his voice. He had made this trip seem so important and yet so simple. This trip had become anything less than simple now, as far as she was concerned. It almost didn't seem fair to her, like she told Chloe to have to put everything they ever had on the line in just a week. Or maybe it was just the fact she didn't want to hear the truth from him, because maybe after all these years, she was the one who broke his heart.

“Are you ready?” Clark called out to Lana, who was in the bathroom fixing up her make-up.

“Just give me a few more seconds.” Lana said applying some lip glouse and eye shadow to her face.

“You know, since I've decided I want to be completely honest with you on this trip. Now might be a good time to tell you this.” Lana paused at hearing Clark's words. “You've always been the most beautiful girl that I've ever seen and I have never really thought it was necessary for you to apply any make-up. It's like someone trying to change the sunset or sunrise. Why mess with something so naturally beautiful?” Clark asked rhetorically and Lana looked up into the mirror, then to her make-up kit. She stood there for a second in thought, because turning on the water and washing all the make-up she had spent all this time working on, off, every bit of it. She wiped her face dry before she walked out of the bathroom.

“Ready?” Lana stood in front of the door as Clark approached with a loving look on his face.

“Yes, my beautiful sunset.” Clark nodded as the clasped hands and left.

The restaurant looked as good as advertised. Clark and Lana were seated right next to a roaring fire place. It was the perfect place for a romantic outing with the person that you loved. All that was missing was Clark's intent of having that night, because he couldn't fool himself. Tonight wasn't going just about romance, but about pain and regret.

They both shared stares before Clark decided it was best to begin. “I guess since I was the one to plan the trip and the reason for the trip, you might as well as have the honor of asking me the first question.” Clark motioned for Lana to go ahead.

“Anything I want?” Lana looked for reassurance on that.

“Anything that you want, from any part of our lives and I promise you that I will answer it to the best of my ability.” Clark sincerely replied.

“Ok.” Lana said and lost in the thought of the memory she was going to re-visit tonight. “I want to know about the weekend before I left for Paris.” Lana's eyes motioned to him with curiousty.

“That weekend? What a weekend that was.” Clark stopped for a second, to try and collect his thoughts about what was one of the worse weekends of his life. “I wanted to ask to dinner in hopes of keeping you from going to Paris and leaving me. I just couldn't lose the girl that I loved, not without a fight.”

“And what made you think I would stay?” Lana wanted to know as he unknowingly moved closer to him.

“I was going to tell you the truth about me and anything else you wanted to know.” Clark replied and Lana nodded.

“But you didn't. Just like every other time you would back out of telling me the truth after seemingly no time at all.” Lana's resentment clear in her voice.

“It was Pete.”

“Pete?” Lana was now confused. “What does Pete have to do with us? I don't understand.” Clark sighed, almost unwilling to say why.

“Pete was the first to know why secret or should I say find out about my secret. He kind of stumbled upon my spaceship and I had to tell him the truth or lose him forever, so I did. What I never fully realized was how much of a burden it was on him. Then during one weekend, he was almost beaten to death by a dirty FBI agent and that was enough for him. That's why he left with mother, because of the burden of my secret.” Clark shook his head as he peared into Lana's eyes. “I just couldn't let that happen to you.” Lana's eyes watered.

“I'm sorry Clark, I wish I could have been there for you. I wish you could have told me that.” Lana paused as she now looked confused. “But what I find strange, is that it seemed you were going to tell me the day I left, at your farm.” Clark turned away at her comment.

“I was, but when you mentioned my cousin, I just stopped and hoped to tell you on the way or I don't know. I just didn't know what to do and I might as well tell you about my cousin, since I mentioned her.” Clark changed topics.

“Yeah, now you mentioned it, I don't remember that girl looking like Kara, unless you have two beautiful blonde cousins.” Lana said as she looked to Clark for an answer.

“She wasn't really my cousin, just a girl that Jor-el had confused into thinking she was from my planet and that we were suppose to be together. Jor-el actually eneded up killing her, then threatening to kill my dad if I didn't go with him, which is why I was gone the whole summer.” Clark's anger showing on his face. Lana reached over, placing her on his for comfort.

“I'm sorry.” Lana sincerely said, before pulling away. “Why don't we take a break to eat.” Lana suggested.

“Yeah.” Clark agreed. The waiter soon came over to take their order. Seeing as how she had lived in France for three months, Lana take the pleasure of ordering for them. All Clark had heard was something about snails, not like it matter though, because he could eat anything.

The dinner went by rather quickly as there was still a lot to be talked about and a lot that needed to be heard. “Clark, why couldn't you say goodbye?” Lana said, somewhat out of the blue.

“I guess it was just too hard.” Clark answered, knowing what she was talking about.

“That's not an acceptable answer today.” Lana firmly said to him with hard eyes.

“You're right. It just seemed like everything was falling around me and I frooze. First Pete leaves, everything with Chloe going to witness protect and then to finding out that Lex had been spying on me with a room full of things about me as well as my parents.” Clark's face filled with pain. “When I saw him there with you, saying goodbye, I just too hurt to do anything, because I knew that should have been me there. So I did what I always did, turned away, because the hurt was too much.” Clark looked down in pair, before Lana's hand brought up his chin.

“And what would you have said?” Lana needed to know, so she could forever change her memory on that moment.

Clark got up from his chair and kneel down in front of Lana's, taking her hands in his. “I would have told you that I will always love you and that I promise to open up to if you give me the chance. A chance that I know that I don't deserve, but one that I'm begging for, because you mean everything to me. But if you want to go to Paris, because it's your dream, then go. Just know that I'll be on the next flight to Paris if you do, because I love you too much to just let you walk away and I know you love me too.” A tear dropped from Lana's eye as Clark took his finger and wiped it away.

“I would have never left.” Lana whispered, before they both leaned in for a kiss that was unavoidable at this point.

[SVsleuth]

Don't stop....

It's really wonderful, seeing them finally be so open and honest with each other. I love that Lana will change her memory of the things of the past, as she finds out what was really going on at the time. so many times, if she had known the truth, she would have made different choices. At least, this time, Clark is finally being honest, no backing out, just raw honesty. It's quite refreshing. PPMS!

[basketballstar23]

that was phenomenal! a much needed update which happend to brighten my spirits to say the less. Honestly loved it. PPMS for sure! :)

[SVsleuth]

yeah, update soon?

[basketballstar23]

i guess we'll just have to wait patiently, eh SVsleuth? it's okay. i can wait :) but not for long PPMS!

[SmallvilleMan]

The Original

Just like in every race, it's always good to get out to a good start, but it's more important to realize that the start is just that, the start. The race isn't over yet and there are many hurddles left to overcome. That's the mind set that was going through Clark and Lana's head as they arrived back in the hotel. Both of them having decided that it was for the best that they rested for the night at the hotel, although not without letting Clark have his turn. There could be no rest from that, otherwise they'd have a much longer rest than they would want and it would be without each other.

They had chosen to have the discussion out on the balcony. Sort of like giving them an alternate loft setting, although depending on how you look at it, may not be a good thing considering that's where most of the lies have taken place. “Ask away.” Lana said bracing herself on the railing.

“Ok.” Clark thought for a second. “Before the second metoer shower, you came to me and gave me one of the stones and there was blood on it, when I asked you about it, you just said to trust you.” Clark explained the situation before asking the question. “What happened with the stone?” Clark stared curiously at Lana whose face had now turned to a slightly horrifyed expression.

“I........I............” Lana turned away.

“It's ok, I promise.” Clark tried to reassure her.

Lana gulped before trying to put together an answer to a question that had haunted her for a long time. “The night before the meteor shower, Geneive Teague broke into my apartment wanting the stone and pulled a gun on me. I managed to knock away the gun, but she got on top of me and started to choke me.” Lana stopped as Clark looked on helplessly, as if the moment was happening right now. “Then, suddenly I closed my eyes and when I opened them I was kneeling on top of her with a bloodied stone in my hand. She was dead.” Lana closed her eyes in sadness, not for the loss of someone who was clearly a bad person, but for taking a life. Something that never is easy for a good caring person.

“Hey, look at me.” Clark lifted her chin so her eyes were at his eye level. “If you don't remember doing anything, then it wasn't you. It must have been Isabel and in any case, all you were doing was defending yourself. I would never want you to take any risks when it comes to saving your life.” Clark firmly told her with gentle eyes.

“It just hard to talk about, even if what I was doing was just protecting myself. I can still remember the feeling of seeing blood all over my hands, like I was a murderer. I felt so guilty and a part of me thought that maybe you would look at me differently because of it.” Lana confessed a long awaited truth.

“You're not a murderer, you never were and you never will be. Also, to be fair, I'm the one that said we should let the past stay in the past. Seemed like a good idea at the time, but I guess can never escape our past.” Clark concluded.

“No, we can't.” Lana agreed and continued. “There's more though.” Lana added and Clark looked as if he was about to ask about that.

“Funny, I was just going to ask why you couldn't go with my parents and leave Smallville. Although, considering that Jason hijacked them on their way out and tried to kill them, that might have been a good thing.” Clark said in a relieved tone. “It's just I had a very bad feeling, especially after you made it seem like we would never see each other again and with the meteor shower going on. I've just wished so many times that I could have picked you up and ran you to China or something.” Lana smiled slightly at Clark's admission.

“And I'm sure if I let you, you would have ran me to China, except I couldn't go. You may have not considered me a murderer, but if the police found out what happened, they might not have been so kind. So after I left the barn, I went back to the Lex's.” Lana began to explain before Clark stopped her.

“What do you mean you went back?” Clark focused on that word.

“When I woke up after Isabel took control of me, I saw Lex standing in the door way and trust me when I say this, if I wasn't completely hysterical at that point, I would have ran to you. Instead, I ended up going to the mansion where Lex promised to help me. I told him what happened and at first he seemed to believe me, but as time went on I wouldn't so sure he did. I think all he wanted was the stone, as he would try to get me to give it to him, but I didn't think he could be trusted. So I gave it to the person who I trusted most in the world.” Lana locked eyes with Clark after her last sentence.

“Not to sound ungrateful, but you said you thought the stone was meant for me?” Clark questioned and Lana smiled.

“I know, hard to believe. I guess you could call it a hunch, after all you have to admit things in Smallville did seem to have a way of revolving around Clark Kent, especially the weird things.” Lana reasoned.

“Can't argue with that.”

“Anyways, the more time I spent at the mansion, the more I knew Lex was full of crap. I just didn't feel I had many options at that point. Luckly, Lex had arranged a helicopter ride out of town, but before I left he grabbed my purse looking for the stone. I should have known right then and there what kind of person he was.” Lana angrily glared to the side.

“We'll get to that later, I'm just glad to have this cleared up. I never did enjoy having to guess where the girl I loved was during a meteor shower.” Clark placed his hand on the Lana's cheek slowly.

“I wish I just told you right away.” Lana scoffed at her mistake.

“Probably for the better, because I might have killed Lex.” Clark joked.

“Can't say I agree, I don't think I would have missed him.” Clark laughed at her comment and brought her into a hug.

“Before we call it a night, do you know what caused the meteor shower?” Lana had always wondered and Clark's face filled with guilt.

“It was job to re-unite the stones and instead I had choosen to ignore that. So when Isabel killed Mrs. Teague, it set off the meteor shower as well as the release of the kryptonians you met and something worse.” Clark informed her.

“Something worse?” Lana's curiousity was now peaked.

“Milton Fine, he was a computer program that was created on Krypton . He has all my abilities and all the knowledge of what use to be my home planet. He was also the one who set up Lex and released Zod through him more than a year ago. He was the most dangerous enemy I ever encountered, luckly he's gone.” Clark let out a sigh of relief.

“I wouldn't so sure.” Lana replied and Clark/s eyes widened.

“What do you mean?” Clark immediately asked.

“Bizarro told me something about a compute program. He said he was going to stop it, but somehow I doubt that.” Clark paced around the balcony for a second.

“Welll, when I get back, I'm going to find him. I can't imagine what he's been doing. However, I'm not going to worry now. This trip is about us and I'm committed to fixing us before anything else.” Clark walked up to Lana again.

“So am I.” Lana echo's his statement and they shared a small kiss before they headed to bed for the night.

It was 11pm, Paris time, when Clark began to sitr. How he had missed the days of getting up late and just rolling around in bed. Of course that wasn't an easy mission for anyone to accomplish if they lived on a farm, not even someone like Clark.

He turned to sneak a peak at Lana, who was still sleeping peacefully on the other side of the bed. Something that they had become use to other the past week, even since he had come back. Normally the bed was the place where your nightmares took place, but to Clark, it was the nightmare itself.

Lana had felt his eyes on her and rolled to her side to catch his glaze. “Hey.” Lana smiled warmly at him as Clark's expression stay the same hurtful way.

“Hey.” Clark muttered and Lana caught the expression on his face

“You look you have something on your mind.” Clark got up from the bed and walked to the window of the balcony.

“Of course I do.” Clark flatly answered.

“I saw the way you just looked at me and......” Lana hated to bring this subject up. “Despite all the things we could talk about, it isn't hard to tell what that look comes from.” Lana shout back.

“We'll get to what I'm thinking later. I just don't want to do it now.” Clark responded as he stared out into the sunny day.

“No.” Lana said in a firm tone. “You're not going to push something back again. You said we're going to get everything out, so why wait for the perfect time to do it?” Lana argued and Clark turned to her, seemingly in agreement.

“Fine.” Clark walked up to her side of the bed. “Tell me, how did he kiss you?” Lana was shocked at Clark's question.

“What?”

“How did he kiss you?” Clark repeated his question. “Was it like this?” Clark leaned in, capturing her lips and gentle biting down them before pulling away slowly. “Or was it like this?” This time Clark captured her whole mouth, using his hand to cup her cheek and not releasing until he was sure Lana needed to breath.

“I.....uh......Clark.” Lana staggered with her words.

“And how did he touch you?” Clark now asked, clearly on a mission. “Like this?” Clark's hands roamed under the blanket gently going over Lana's stomach again and again as Lana's eyes began to roll back. “Or maybe it was like this?” His hands now roamed over her entire lower body.

“Clark.......” Were the only words Lana could even muster as continued his assualt. He was going to prove without a shadow a doubt that the original was always better than the copy and that his love was much stronger.

[The Black Cat]

Very good chapter!

[SVsleuth]

Yeah! Get past the real issue, Clark. You can do it. Show her that the original is the best.

Wonderful chapter. PPMS!

[kentfamily]

wow! Thats was good! Cant wait for the next chapter.;)

[basketballstar23]

update? the last one was fantastic! i'm excited to see where this one plays out :) PPMS!

[Shelbyismyhero]

great stuff

ppms!

[basketballstar23]

looking forward to an update SVM :)

[SmallvilleMan]

Kal

Clark and Lana laid in bed together tangled up in the sheets exhausted from the past seven hours of making love. Even Clark, who wasn't prone to this kind of exhaustion, was completely out of breath and barely could move. Not even the kryptontian powers could keep up with the mission of a man to prove to the girl he loves that he's better in bed than the imposter that took his place weeks ago. A mission that was more than accomplished.

“So..........” Clark whispered.

“You've.........so............been..........holdin g............out............on.............me. I.............don't..............think............ I...........can...........move.” Lana answered as if she was on her last breath of air and from the feeling in her throat as the lack of bodily fluids, it might have felt that way.

“Good, that was the idea.” Clark grinned, slowly making his way out of the bed to grab a bottle of water. He knew how much Lana must be thristy and dry, since he felt like he would died without some water, despite the fact that was impossible. “Here.” Clark handed her the water and she gulped it down the whole thing in a matter of seconds.

Clark couldn't help but laugh at how fast she drank the water. “If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were A.C.'s sister.” Clark chuckled and Lana gave him a half smile.

“I'm sorry, some of us need aren't kryptontian and need some fluids in their body. Seems that all of mine were sucked out of me.” Lana said, making sure to get her point across and in a joking manner.

“That was kind of the point.” Clark jumped back into bed.

“Point made, almost makes me want to find another guy and sleep with me. Then you might so mad you might even top that performance.” Lana raised her eyebrows in curiousty.

“I doubt it, I think next time I'll concentrate on breaking every bone in that guy's body and I do mean everyone.” Clark emphaized the last part.

“Hmmm, now you sound like Kal. Can't say I like that or don't like that.......Kal's confusing.” Lana paused as a thought came to her. “Speaking of Kal, how many times have you been corrupted by him?” Lana was interested to know.

“Well.” Clark thought back. “The first time was when Jesse came to our school, thanks to the new school rings. Which lead to our first offical date and our second kiss. There was also the time Pete drugged me with red k and lucky me, that was the day after I asked you out, which lead to the kiss you saw with Chloe.” Clark stopped to let Lana say something.

“Yeah, not exactly our shinning moments, except for the asking out part the second time. Although, Kal did know how to kiss and his confidence was a little bit refreshing.” Lana admitted as it seemed to jade Clark a little bit.

“Then there was the time I left. This time I had put the ring on and Kal was the one who asked you to come with him, not to mention the guy who you saw in Metropolis. He also made an appearance during senior year. Alicia put on a necklace with red k so I would marry her and leave Smallville with her.” Clark stopped when he saw Lana's expression change.

“Alicia.........Hard to think of a lot of people I disliked more.......Well, outside of the Luther family that is.” Lana confessed as Clark looked on knowingle.

“I understand, she tried to kill you.” Clark looked softly toward her.

“Yes, but it isn't all about that.” Lana turned to him her eyes lowered. “I believed her when she told me that you told her the truth about yourself. I could see it on your face when I talked to you the day after she tried to kill me. I just couldn't understand why you could be open with her and not me. Then you took her back, even though she tried to kill me and that hurt even more. That's what I was so upset about.” Lana eyes lifted slightly to find his.

“I thought I could be open with her, because she had powers like I did and no, I didn't tell her, she found out.” Clark paused to put his hand on Lana's cheek. “And she never made me feel like you do. I could have never loved her, like I love you.” Clark kissed her softly on the lips.

“Well, I guess that's another memory that needs to be changed.” They both smiled, before Clark got back to the days as Kal.

“As for Kal, he did one more appearance. I think you remember this well, it was at your engagement party. Lois had kissed me with red k lipstick and Kal decided to crash the party. I still can't believe what I said to my mom and Chloe” Clark said in a regretful tone.

“I wanted to kill you, but then at the loft, something changed.” Lana told him and Clark looked on confused.

“What do you mean?” Clark wanted to know.

“I don't know, it seemed like for a couple seconds that I was talking to you. I mean, talking to the real Clark, without the red k as he told me he still loved me.” Lana explained.

“I guess Kal can't be wrong all the time.” Clark joked and Lana nodded her head.

“Sometimes he's needed, we all need to see the other sides of ourself once and a while.” Lana said and also remembered something. “Also, I think you forgot to mention when Kal tried to kiss me and Chloe during senior year. You know, the time you caught me and Jason kissing in his office.” Lana reminded him as Clark got that deer in the headlights look on his face.

“Oh boy.......”

“What is it Clark?” Now Lana seemed nervous.

“That wasn't Kal........” Clark said as Lana now seemed very nervous.

“Then who was it?” Lana needed to know.

“Well, you remember the symbol on your lower back, right?” Lana nodded at his question. “That was the symbol for transference and Lionel had one of those stones. He was going to use it to steal Lex's body and trap Lex in his body, however I jumped in between them. So Lionel was transferred into my body and vice versa.” Clark recapped for Lana.

“OH MY GOD.” Lana put her hand over her mouth. “I think I'm going to be sick. Good thing I have no fluids left in my body..” Lana held her stomach, but then realized something more important. “Then you didn't know that me and Jason were together when I comfronted you in the hallway?” Lana closed her eyes in pain at her mistake.

“No. It was quite the shock to know that somebody I actually liked as a friend would be dating the girl I love. It's safe to say that my whole week was ruined.” Clark tried to forget that week.

“I'm sorry, I should have known better or at least been better about it. I guess I was still mad at you for what happened the year before and the forced kiss. I know you would never do that to me, I'm so dumb.” Lana attacked herself.

“To be honest, I should have told you and Chloe. It's just hard for me. Besides, I get use to the pain I keep inside.” Clark said as Lana shook her head, but stopping from pushing on her thoughts.

“Well, since I asked you a question. How about you?” Anything you want to know?” Lana asked some what hesitantly.

“Yeah, what's the number to room serivce, because I'm striving.” Clark rubbed his stomach.

“You except me to eat after heaing about Lionel kissing me?” Lana eyes widened in question.

“Oh come on, you big baby, they were my lips.” Clark teased her. “And it isn't like you kissed a three or four hundred year old women in Isabel, but it was your body, so I can't complain.” Clark told her Lana and Lana's eyes mouth dropped.

“You two were kissing?” Lana couldn't believe it.

“Just twice and once before I knew itwasn't you.” Clark shrugged like it was nothing.

“Men........Always looking for a freebie.” Lana huffed.

“Just pass the room service menu.” Clark ordered and Lana did so.

After searching through the menu, Clark and Lana both found what they wanted, then placed their order. It wasn't long before their food had arrived and they dug in. Both were much hungrier than they thought, as room service would have to make a second trip to the room for dessert.

“I really hope that we don't come back to the farm to find out it was re-possessed, because you overspent on your credit card.” Lana said after looking at all the food they had eaten.

“Some things are worth more than money.” Clark smiled warmly at her.

“Which reminds me, it's your turn.” Lana motioned for him to go ahead.

“Ok.” Clark tried to think about what he wanted to ask. “When were dating our first year in college, you seem determined to find out the truth about the meteor shower. Why?” Clark questioned her and Lana looked thoughtfully away before turning to him.

“I guess a lot of that had to do with my parents. I just wanted to know the truth.” Lana simply answered.

“I can understand your parents, but what I can't is why the truth meant so much. It's a question that confuses me when it comes to other people too, especially Lex.” Clark said as Lana looked on knowingly.

“I know it's hard for you , because of who you are. But you have understand how hard it is to be on the outside of things and not know why everything is happening. It's like I said to you before, I was almost killed by those aliens from the spaceship and by the meteor freaks. Sometimes we all need answers.” Lana tried to convince.

“But at what cost? Lex sacrificed our friendship trying to find those answers and you moving away didn't do anything good for ours.” Clark firmly said.

“You couldn't have expected me to live in igornace and that's not why I moved away. I moved away to try and save our relationship, because I could tell the Clark Kent shields were up again.” Lana snapped back and Clark nodded his head.

“You're right, the shields were up again, but I just don't understand putting yourself in a situation where you could get hurt for something like the truth. I've lived with the truth my entire life and I'd give it up in a second for ignorance.” Clark honestly confessed.

“Maybe you're right, but there were some things I just needed to know. I couldn't go through the rest of live wondering what happened.” Lana softly said moving closer to Clark.

“I guess that's my fault, if I told you, then we wouldn't have to go through that.” Clark regretfully mentioned.

“You made a choice, not one I agree with, but you did make one. As did I, so we just have to accept that.” Lana concluded.

“Until we get to some other things you mean?” Clark pointed out.

“Well, yes.” Lana said without hesitation.

[basketballstar23]

another great one SVM. i love their open-ness with eachother...kinda lol can't wait for the next :) PPMS!

[SVsleuth]

Wonderful continuation of their talking - after the best time in bed ever for Lana. Clark sure showed her who's the best.

There's just so much these two have to reveal to each other, so much that went unsaid for so many years. It's so good to finally have them talk it all out, get it out in the open, so they can move on together.

Thanks for the update.

PPMS!

[SmallvilleMan]

I'm going to try for tonight.

[basketballstar23]

YAY! i'm glad. this story is great. can't wait SVM! :)

[SmallvilleMan]

Scars

Clark and Lana spent the rest of the night healing from the exhausting events of the day. Exhaushting was the word for it, as they rolled out of bed at two the next day. Something that was a daily routine on weekends for college kids and after all, they were still the age of college kids, so that seemed fair.

“So what's on tap for today?” Lana leaned up against Clark as he put on some jeans.

“Well, I thought you could show me around. I mean, you did live here a whole summer, so I thought you would know some good places to go.” Clark thought as Lana seemed ok with the idea.

“Sounds good, I can show you this nice breakfast place that me and Jason went to.” Lana said, not thinking the name Jason meant much.

“Jason..........” Clark trailed off at his name.

“Sorry.” Lana apologized, but Clatk didn't seem to put off by the name.

“No, it's not that.” Clark paused. “Actually, picturing you with another guy is not something I like to do, but I did like Jason. I always thought he was a good guy and stood up a lot for me during football.” Clark explained his thoughts on Jason.

“He did seem like a good guy, but in retrospect, he wasn't much difference than Lex.” Lana stopped to look at Clark's reaction. “I could explain further, but I think it's better if we just go through our stuff.” Lana suggested.

“Agreed, some things I'd rather not known. So you ready to go?” Clark offered his hand and Lana gave him hers, then they left.

They approached the little cafe, hand in hand. Clark opened the door for Lana to enter, she thanked him with a smile and they walked in. The place was nicely decorated, with creative colored paintings on the wall and small two person tables. “How do you like it?” Lana wanted to know.

“Looks like a colorful place, but i'm not sure I like those stools. They don't look like they could hold half of me.” Clark pointed to the stools and Lana tried not to laugh.

“You'll be fine, come on.” Lana took his hand and they took a seat at one of the tables. A waiter approached them and gave them both menus. After, searching through the menu, both of them had finally decided and the waiter return.

“Go ahead.” Clark offered to let Lana go first, so she went right ahead and as she was ordering Clark caught the waiter looking down Lana's shirt. So much so, that he fell off the stool. “Clark!” Lana called out.

“Are you done?” Clark asked with a strange smile and Lana nodded, so Clark went ahead to order. When he finished he walked up to the waiter and whispered something in his ear. After Clark finished, the waiter gulped and his eye widened before he cautiously walked away. Lana stared at Clark curiously as Clark sat back down.

“What did you say to him?” Lana questioned with a smile.

“Nothing for your gentle ears to hear.” Clark softly answered.

“Mmmmhmmm.” Lana just murmured as they shared a small look, before Lana changed the subject. “So, shall we begin?” Lana placed her face in her hands awaiting an answer.

“Anytime you're ready, dear.” Clark calmly rested back in his chair.

“Ok.” Lana reached into her memory banks, prepared for whatever she might find. “How could you ever tell me that you don't love me?” The expression Lana's face said it all, as she asked that question.

“To be honest I don't know.” Clark truthfully answered as turned away slightly.

“Please, tell me that isn't your final answer. It's safe to say that we have ventured into an area where it's best we stay awayin from our old habits.” Lana hinted very strongly at him.

“I know.” Clark agreed before going on. “And If I had an answer, I would tell you, but the God honest truth is that I really don't know.” Clark stopped again as Lana hoped for more of an answer. “I've done a lot of things in my life. Many of them seemed impossible and far-fetched for even someone like me to do, but saying that was easily the toughest. I still can't believe to this did that I even did, that I even found the words to say it as I looked into your eyes that day. To this day, it feels like that was just a bad dream, that it was my dream self who said that, because could never say that. I could never find within myself to lie like that, to lie about something that would break both our hearts at once and to watch yours break, because of me. I just don't how I did, but I did and if I could back in time, to any moment, besides one where I could save a life. I would go back in time and say something else, anything else.” Both of their eyes watered at his words.

“Then why would you ever say that?” Lana asked with a pleading tone.

“I didn't think I had a choice.” Clark tried to reason with her and Lana shook her head.

“You always think that, it isn't always like that, especially in this case.” Lana quickly responded.

“I just thought that if I didn't say that, you hold on and contrary what these past few months has shown. I still believe that I know you and I knew you weren't going to let go.” Clark explained his thoughts.

“Why would be a bad thing?” Lana whispered as tears threatening to come.

“I guess you would have understand my feelings at those time.” Clark told her and she grabbed his hands, in almost a symbolic way for holding onto him, so he wouldn't back away.

“Then make me understand, that's all I want to do, is understand this.” Lana held his hands tightly.

“The day my dad died was the day I loss hope. The hope that we could ever be together and any hope at all. I guess you could say I was lost, mostly because I no longer had my dad and I knew that it was my fault.” Clark began before Lana stopped him.

“Please, don't start blaming yourself again. Your dad had heart problems.” Lana interrupted.

“But you don't know that he got those heart problems from receiving Jor-el's powers to come bring me home from Metropolis and you also don't know about the election day.” Clark paused as now Lana's face became struck with confusion. “The first time, on the day of my father's election, I told you the truth about me and then I asked you to marry me. At first, you seem confused and taken aback by the whole thing, but before we went to the talon you came by the house and accepted my marriage purposal.” Lana smiled brightly as Clark braced himsaelf for the next part. “We told my parents about the marriage and they were so happy. Then Lois asked for us to take a family picture, after my dad had won, so I left you there for what seemed like a second. When I came back, you were gone, but I received a call and it was from you. You said that Lex was chasing you on route 4, before Lobe Bridge and that he had known you were keeping my secret.” Clark paused once more, his eyes loss in the moment. “I didn't know what was happening. Suddenly, I heard a crash and ran as fast as I could to you, but it was too late. There you were, dead.” Clark's face strained in pain. “So I did the only thing I could....I....I.....went to Jor-el and pleaded with him to turn back time. He refused at first, but utlimately gave in and I got to replay the day, except this time I had to watch you walk out. This time, I had to watch my dad die and realize that I could never be with you. I couldn't imagine a worse day if I tried.” Clark tried to hold himself together as Lana stroked his hands gently.

“Clark I....” Lana started.

“Why couldn't have I asked you to be in the picture?” Clark questioned out load.

“What?” Lana didn't know what he meant.

“Lois asked for a picture with the family. Why couldn't I have asked you to be in the picture? You were going to be a part of the family. If I had just asked for you to be in the picture, maybe everything would have been ok. Maybe my dad would still be alive.” Clark reached for answers.

“No, he wouldn't have been.” Lana flatly said and began to explain. “From what you said, it looked fate just wasn't on our side that day. You saved me, but your dad died and when he didn't die, I died. Sometimes things are meant to happen, sometimes God just takes over.” Lana said with a convincing tone.

“In a way, no matter how much I want to change things, I understand that. Two years ago, I didn't and I couldn't. I had loss so much hope and as I saw you slipping away, I couldn't do anything about it. Then Simone came.” Lana stopped Clark.

“I don't want to hear you blame yourself for her.” Lana firmly told him.

“I don't blame myself for what happen. I blame myself for putting that look on your face when you saw the two of us together. A look that I put on your face so many times during those past two months. I just kept hurting you and hurting you. I couldn't take it anymore, so that's when I decided to say those words to you.” Clark shook his head. “I still remember falling to my heads after I said it, seeing the look in your eyes and knowing what I had done. It's a scar that may never heal.” Clark looked away.

“Some scars aren't meant to heal, but are there to serve as a reminder of what we've learned.” Clark looked up at Lana's encouraging words. “And what I hope you learned is that if you ever said that to me again, you better hope there's no kryponite laying around.” Lana eased the moment with a joke.

“There wouldn't need to be, because no kryponite can inflict that pain that those words caused.”

[basketballstar23]

that's what Im talking about! Get it all out there in the open. Another great one SVM! Can't wait for the next one as always! :)

[SmallvilleMan]

I have a feeling smallville's episode is going to get me going tonight.........So, be on the look out.......

[basketballstar23]

yay! trust me i will! yes...todays smallville does look promising :)

[SVsleuth]

Thanks for the update, Harry. Taking it all out now. It's about time!

PPMS!

[SmallvilleMan]

Swinging

`They held each other's hand tighter than usual as they walked down the streets of Paris. Both of them knew that it was a good thing to get out everything that they already had, but at the same time they both realized that the more they go out, the closers they got to the bigger things. The closer they got to saying the things that would hurt the most. The closer they got to revealing the things that would hurt the most. More importantly, the closer they got to determinding if they we're going to leave Paris together or as two different people.

As they continued to walk down the street, Lana noticed the old park she use to frequently visit when trying to gain inspiration or just to take pictures of. “Why don't we take a walk in the park?” Lana suggested and Clark nodded in agreement.

“Looks like a peaceful place.” Clark said as he looked around the park and saw children playing with their parents, women running with their dogs as well as grandparents feeding ducks with their grandchildren.

“It is.” Lana smiled thinking about to her time her. “I came here a lot to think. It was almost like my own personal loft, just without any walls.” Clark smiled warmly at the peaceful look Lana's memories gave her.

“Never a bad thing to have a place where you can just think and clear your thoughts of anything that has been bothering you.” Clark pointed out.

“No, it can never be a bad thing.” Lana paused as she looked at the swings. “Want to go for a swing?” Lana turned to him with an inviting smile.

“Sure.” Clark said and they walked toward the swings. Each of them taking one swing, side by side each other and began to pump their feet to get some air.

“I forgot how much fun this was.” Lana leaned her head back, letting her hair flow through the air as she went back and forth.

Clark couldn't help but smile to himself as he watched her, because he realized this was one of those moments. One of those moments where you look to the person you care about most in the world and feel at that exact moment, how much you do love them. How much you never want this moment to end, because there isn't a more perfect feeling in the world, then the one you have right now.

“What?” Lana stopped swinging, when she noticed he was starring at her.

“I was just wishing that I could freeze time and I could live in this moment for the rest of my life.” Clark warmly told her as Lana's eyes began to melt with love.

“Would it be wrong if I asked you to get us out of here and to our hotel room now?” Lana questioned with her eyes firmly on Clark.

Everyone in the park stopped for a moment, as they all turned around in various dirrections, wondering where that gust of wind could have came from and why they're two empty swings moving up and down.

Clark held tightly to Lana as they laid in a spooning position on the bed. It was a postion that Clark had decided on this trip that he wanted to be in every time that they were in bed. Sort of like a symbol of togetherness, instead of two people on two different sides of the bed. He knew one thing, it couldn't hurt.

“Are you going to make me wait any longer?” Lana randomly asked Clark and snapped him out of his train of thought.

“For what?” Clark said, obviously not completely out of his own thoughts.

“I don't know, far be it from me to want to dig in our history and find a questionable thing i've done or something you want to know. Makes me nervous even to look back and even more nervous when you take such a long time to ask it.” Lana squirmed in his arms.

“Fair enough.” Clark gave in, already knowing a question that was on his mind and had haunted him for much of the latter part of two years ago. “Why drugs? Why would you try and hurt yourself like that?” The mere question threatened to water Clark's eyes.

“I really wish I could explain that week to you.” Lana gulped and Clark brought his face to hers.

“You can, because as long as I have you in my arms, nothing can hurt you.” He whispered and brought a small smile to her face.

“That week was easily the worst of my entire life. I know that may seem strange, considering my parents had died when I was a young kid, but you never truly understand how much pain you're in when you're that young.” Lana paused. “After you said that you didn't love me anymore. I felt completely broke inside. It didn't matter if I thought you were lying or not, in fact, I'm not sure which one hurt more as I thought about it. Would it be worse for you really to not love me anymore? Or was it worse that you would said that to me? Those two questions only enchanced my pain and continued to break me up inside.” Lana stopped, trying not to relive the moment, but it wasn't going to happen.

“It's ok.” Clark reassured her.

“For the first time in my life, I was dying and there was no one to save me. You weren't going to be there for me, you couldn't be, because you had done this to me. Except at that point, I was too hurt to be mad. I didn't want to talk to Chloe, not the person who had lied to me and not the person who you had trusted.” Lana paused, angry about the name she was going to mention. “Then there was Lex, who was the only person I could talk to, but I didn't want to. I knew he couldn't help me, no matter how much I thought he was my friend. I needed somone who I knew loved me and could make everything ok.” Lana explained through her pain.

“Your parents.” Clark injected.

“Yes, I needed them. They were the only ones in this world who I thought could me. So I found a guy on campus who could do this and did everything that I could to make it happen.” Lana flashed a smile for a second. “When I saw them, it was like for a couple seconds, everything was fine. I was with my parents and there were going to be there for him, because they loved me.” Lana confessed.

“I can't blame you for wanting to see your parents. I just wish it didn't come with the risk of losing your life and also wish I could have been there.” Clark softly said.

“I know........There's just some points in your life where you just don't care anymore and I was at that point.” Lana replied.

“Because of what I did........” Clark stopped her from speaking. “I know, you did what you did, because of you, but it was my mistake not see consequences for what my words would say. The look in your eyes when I saw you that week was unbearable and I'd be lying if I didn't say that it didn't drive me from wanting to find some green kryponite.” Clark informed her.

“No doubt a week that we could have lived without.” Lana noted.

“Yes.” Clark agreed.

“But, it does give me the chance to apologize to you.” Lana said and Clark looked surprised at her.

“For what?” Clark wanted to know.

“For getting you into that situation. Whatver personal problems we have our own problems and we don't have the right to hurt the people we love. Even if we want to punch them for breaking our hearts. If I was that bad already, I don't want to think of how bad I would have been if I had been the one to cause your death. For that, I am sorry.” Lana apologized.

“I accept. I will always accept your apology.” Clark leaned down and captured her lips.

[basketballstar23]

mmm fantastic as always SVM! loving this story more and more! PPMS!

[St. Jimmy]

i love this fic. please update more soon. ive just been a guest on here until recently....this and a few other fics made me decide to join and do stuff....so i really like this

ppms

[SVsleuth]

Thanks, Harry. Those season 5 episodes are the ones I most love to forget. Yet somehow, the Clana love endures. PPMS!

[SmallvilleMan]

Levity

Restlessness took over Clark as he rolled over in his bed, eyes still closed as he struggled to make himself fall asleep. Memories had a way of doing this to him, especially the ones he had wished to forget. Most notably the one when he walked into Lex's mansion and saw the girl he loved kissing his former friend. It was his own personal walking nightmare and this time his mother wasn't there to walk him up, then reassure him it wasn't real. No, there wasn't any reassure this time, just a slap into reality and the added burden of guilt he placed on himself.

Clark finally stop trying and slipped out of bed, only to find Lana standing in front of the window in her robe. “I guess I'm not the only one can't sleep.” Clark smiled softly.

“You would be correct.” Lana said, keeping her eyes toward the window.

“Anything we feel comfortable getting into now?” Clark hesitnatly questioned.

“Sometimes not being able to sleep is just that Clark. Obviously I wouldn't agrue there is a lot on mind, but that's no why I'm up.” Lana answered very simply.

“Oh, can't say I haven't done that before.” Clark turned to the window.

“It's always nice to have some time just to think about nothing or everything. A little levity never killed anyone.” Lana paused and turned to Clark. “You should try it.” Lana grinned and Clark turned to her with a curious look.

“What does that mean?” Clark looked taken aback, but with a smile.

“It means if you were any tighter you might explode.” Lana said trying not to laugh.

“Are you trying to say that I don't do anything fun? Or that I don't take any risks?” Clark wanted to know.

“I am and if you want to prove me wrong, then just say so.” Lana dared him.

“I dare you to prove me wrong.” Clark accepted her challenge and Lana grinned.

“Get dressed.” Lana ordered as she walked from the window, grabbed her bag and walked into the bathroom, then shut the door behind. Clark looked on with a strange look, before putting on some jeans and a shirt.

When Lana had finished getting dressed, she and Clark walked out of their room, then took the elavator down to the first floor. Lana led Clark by hand through the hallways, until finally, they reached the swimming pool.

“The pool?” Clark mumbled as Lana pulled him inside. Once in front of the pool, Lana stopped and looked around for other people. She smiled widely when saw no one.

“Ok, Mr. Kent. Let's see how much of a risk taker you are.” Lana took off her top, showing only her bra as Clark eyes began to widened.

“Lana.........” Clark murmuered and Lana then took off your pants.

“Mmmm, this going to be fun.” Lana seducetively smirked, before removing everything else and she stood naked before Clark, before giving him a quick on the lips, then dove into the pool.

“Ummmm.....” Clark was still completely dumbfounded.

“Come on, I thought you could handle this. I thought you were Mr. Fun.” Lana made fun of Clark and then Clark broke out in a grin. “What's that for?” Lana wanted to know.

“I was thinking how you loved to stripped down before me before we go swimming..” Clark was now the one making fun of Lana.

“I assume this happened during my “off” days.” Lana emphazied off.

“Well, one of them did. The other was in my dreams, too bad this when my new neighbor decided to invade my dreams. Not like I can blame her, but that dream was so good.” Clark shook his head in slight frustration.

“I don't know about dreams, but the reailty is looking good right now. Although, if you don't get in soon, the only thing you'll have is a dream.” Lana jokingly warned him and that was all Clark needed, as he stripped down and jumped in.

“What do you think of your uptight boyfriend now?” Clark asked with a proud grin.

“I think he should learn when to shut up and kiss me.” Lana said with demand in her voice.

“You were right, there should never be anything between us.” Clark said before he leaned in and captured her lips.

After some much needed levity, falling asleep wasn't so hard for either for them as they curled up in each other's arms on the bed. It was certain how much they wanted to sleep as they even managed not to hear the maid sneak in and notice they were asleep, before leaving, not even bothering to ask when to come back later. Nothing was going to wake them up, until the rumble of their stomachs was felt and eventually that's when Clark began to mumble slighty.

“What time is it?” Lana whispered, with her eyes still closed as Clark peaked over to the alarm clock.

“Three thirty.” Clark groogly answered as he leaned on his pillow.

“Probably time to get up then.” Lana suggested as they both still hadn't moved.

“Ok.” Clark agreed, with his eyes still closed.

“That involves moving Clark.” Lana told him.

“I don't see you moving.” Clark shoot back.

“Fine.” Lana responded and slowly moved out. “But if you don't get up, you be able to shower.” Lana paused after toward the door. “I won't wait too long.” Lana raised her eyebrows seducetively, before suddenly ending up in Clark's arms in the shower.

“Neither will I have.” Clark grinned and Lana giggled.

“Oh my, I've released an animal. Should I check you for red k.” Lana joked.

“If you can find any where to look, then sure.” Clark said, referring to his naked body.

“Good point.” Lana noted and Clark gently put her back on her feet. “Now clean me Clark.” Lana giggled again and Clark nodded, before tossing the soap aside.

“Won't need that.” Clark said, before taking Lana in his arms.

Once all “cleaned”, Clark and Lana went out for some lunch. Choosing one of Lana's old cafes that use to frequent visit. Just another small quiet place, this time with no waiters trying to hit on Lana, as Clark made sure to make things clear from the get go, that he wasn't having any of that. As for talking, there was little of that, just a hunger to fulfill and thoughts to be made about what might be said later. This lunch was just to be a peaceful one, with the occassional locking of eyes and hand holding.

The evening portion of the day was to be held in the Eiffle Tower. I much more joyful trip for the ones with super speed, who don't have to walk any flights of stairs. “Thank you.” Lana said, before Clark let her down and she took in the amazing sight before her. “So beauitful.” Lana peered out into the sky.

“Yes she is.” Clark stared lovingly at Lana, who turned to him with a warm smile.

“You know.......” Lana said placing her hands on his chest. “For someone who knows how to say some of the dumbest thing, you sure do know how to make my heart melt with just one line.” Lana kissed him softly on the lips.

“Just trying to make up for those dumb lines.” Clark said apologetically.

“You don't have to make up anything, you've given me so much.” Lana reassured him.

“But you deserve everything.” Clark tried to convince her and Lana's eyes melted, before they kissed once again.

Lana leaned her head on Clark's shoulder after breaking apart from their kiss. “You know, this is usually the part where we let the pass be the pass.” Lana paused in thought. “But I know, we can't, so ask away.” Lana pulled away and walked toward the railing.

“You're right.” Clark took a breath. “After everything that we had been through with Lex, how you could enter a relationship with him? How could you agree to marry him?” Clark questioned the emotion apparent in his voice.

“I talked to you about being alone, when we discussed why I needed to take drugs and see my parents. The reason for Lex is little more complicated, but not much different.” Lana stopped for a second. “You and Chloe were so secretative, going back and worth. Like you were in your own private group and I was left out, so I went to Lex. I thought he wanted the same thing I did, to find out the truth about the second meter shower. Something that you and Chloe just didn't want to do or just didn't want me to find out about. I couldn't make up my mind on that one, but all I knew is I needed to know the truth.” Lana explained as best she could.

“Even knowing what Lex had done before? You know from experience. I can't just understand that.” Clark confessed.

“That's because you haven't been on my side of things before. You know the answers, I don't and there was someone trying to help me, but the man I love was no where to be found. I was lost Clark and the only thing I saw, was the two people who I loved trying to push away from the answers I needed. Then I saw this other man, someone who I knew I could never trust being there for me, again and again. Coming out with all the rights words that I needed to hear.” Lana tried to show her point of view.

“The man who was manipulating you into you fell in love with him.” Clark snapped back.

“Yes, Clark.......” Lana quickly agreed. “After so many years of being lied to, I just wanted someone to be honest with me and someone to treat as if I was an equal, that didn't need to be protected.” Lana firmly stated.

“Someone not like me.” Clark simply muttered.

“In a way, yes and I guess I was angry too.” Lana paused in thought. “I was just so angry with what happened between us and I made it easy for Lex to slip beyond my radars. All he needed to do was seem to be honest and say a couple right things, then I was his. Then the more lies that continued from you and Chloe, coupled with the Zod thing. We were as far apart as ever and I began to lose part of myself.” Lana turned back to him, although not directly looking at him.

“And then you decided to marry him.” Clark finished what he thought was going to be her next sentence.

“No, when he asked me to marry him, the first thing I thought of was you. But we hadn't even seen each other for a while, until I came to the barn and you shoe'd me away basically.” Lana stopped to lock eyes. “But despite the coldness of that moment, looking into your eyes again, reminded me that I did still love you. That was why I couldn't say yes to Lex, until you pushed me away again, when I you told me you knew about the baby. The heart break of that moment, just led to me to say yes to Lex's purposal.” Lana concluded.

“I didn't know what I do.......It just hurt so much to know you were having someone else's kid.” Clark looked painfully toward her.

“I know, but I guess Lex knew that it would. He played me perfectly.” Lana said with anger in voice.

“Both of us.” Clark deflected the blame. “But what matters the most, is that we made it out and we're ok.” Clark gave a small smile.

“Yeah....” Lana gave a small smile and Clark took her in his arms.

“I just wish I could break him in two.” Clark said, to try and lighten the mode as Lana laid her head on his shoulder.

[basketballstar23]

well that was too cute! atleast they are getting somewhere right? I love it! PPMS SVM! :)

[superman_lives_on]

There's one thing I have to take exception to. Lana never loved Lex in any sense--Lionel and Clark independently pointed that out. Lex just took advantage of her loneliness and desperation and played her until she was delusional enough to think she loved him. That's the key difference in her relationships with Clark and Lex--the former, especially now, is based on knowing the truth of each other's characters, while the latter was purely based on lies and deceit and cruelty. There was never any love between Lex and Lana, no matter what lies they told themselves and each other.

[St. Jimmy]

yay! loved it.....this fic is amazing, im just gonna say. update again soon.

[SVsleuth]

Cute, the trip to the pool - like Nicodemus, & skinnydipping, like at Crater Lake in his dreams. Then a shower to boot. Seems they are still very much in love, yet continuing to meet all the baggage from their past head on.

Thanks for the update. PPMS!

[basketballstar23]

Ppms! :)

[SmallvilleMan]

There's one thing I have to take exception to. Lana never loved Lex in any sense--Lionel and Clark independently pointed that out. Lex just took advantage of her loneliness and desperation and played her until she was delusional enough to think she loved him. That's the key difference in her relationships with Clark and Lex--the former, especially now, is based on knowing the truth of each other's characters, while the latter was purely based on lies and deceit and cruelty. There was never any love between Lex and Lana, no matter what lies they told themselves and each other.

Yes, I agree, she was tricked into loving him.........I read the part again, did I say she was in love with him?

[superman_lives_on]

Yes, I agree, she was tricked into loving him.........I read the part again, did I say she was in love with him?

You made it sound like she actually loved him--but she didn't. She was tricked into THINKING that she loved him. Big difference between actual love and the seeming of love.

[SmallvilleMan]

Update coming........But due to certain circumstances im in a fighting mode, instead of story mode........I'll do my best for tomorrow.

[basketballstar23]

hmmm...well...i'll be looking forward to the update SVM :)

[SmallvilleMan]

I promise there will be an update tomorrow.......I have most of it written, but I didn't want to half-butt(;)) the scene where Lana and Clark talk about his secret.

[basketballstar23]

as long as there's a soon to be update I think we'll live :) ppms!

[SmallvilleMan]

Guilt

“I was protecting you......”

“From what? That's the part I can't figure out...........because Clark, the only thing that keeps hurting me, is you.”

Those two sentences kept going around and around in her head as she sat on her bed. It wasn't just based on the fact that she was about to question this, but that familiar sequence of event had always been going through her head.

It almost seemed funny to her that of all the things they had said and all the arguments about the subject of his secret thatit could all be summed up in just two sentences, one from each of them, yet it had been. At least that was the way she had seen it. Even after finding out about the reason, those two sentences, had always seemed to bother her in one way or another. Except now, maybe after everything that's happened, she could finally figure it all out and put this to rest, at last.

Clark looked down at her, offering his hand. “Are you ready?”

“Of course.” Lana accepted his hand. Their evening last night had ended rather peacefully. Just a quiet dinner atop the Eiffle dinner, with a some moonlight strolling along the streets of Paris. Talking was very light, as to dwell on their previous conversation and the evening ended with some cuddling in bed.

The next morning was much of the same, with breakfast in bed and another trip to the pool. Unlike last time, this one was just for some relaxing and to try out the hot tub. Now, they were headed out for dinner, but to where, only Clark knew.

“So, are you going to tell me?” Lana cuddled up to Clark as they walked side by side.

“If I told you, it would ruin the surprise.” Clark replied, unfazed by Lana's tactics.

“But it would get me excited and that might get you excited.” Lana hinted as she hand slipped below his waist and almost caused Clark to jump.

“Whoa........I may not be human, but let's just say my manly functions are.” Clark lightly took away her hand.

“I thought I broke off that old man Kent routine with our pool stunt.” Lana giggled.

“There's a different between having fun and conducting our own personal porn video right in the middle of a hotel.” Clark scolded her.

“Oh shush. I'm a lady and I would never partake in such a thing.” Lana jokingly said with a pretend snottish attitude.

“I don't know.” Clark reached behind Lana to lightly grab her behind. “I think I could convince you.” Clark dug his face into Lana's neck and began to nibble away as Lana's head laid to the side with her eyes closed.

“Ahem.” The man in the black suit cleared his throat. “AHEM.” Clark and Lana broke apart to see the man standing there with his arms behind his back. “Mister Kent.” He said with his French acsent.”

“Umm, yes.” Clark tried to regain his composure.

“Right this way sir.” The man motioned his hand toward the door. Clark and Lana slowly walked by him as they tried to keep their embarassment down. The man followed them out the door and into the beach, where there was a single table set-up with a champange bottle at the side of the table. “Mister Kent, Ma'am, here is your table compliments of our hotel love bird special. Enjoy.” The man bowed before leaving.

“Hmmmm and I always thought those kind of waiters were only from TV.” Lana laughed as Clark tried to contain himself, but obviously with something else on his mind.

“I thought the same about angels.” Clark glazed lovingly upon Lana and they shared a short kiss.

“Mmmm.” Lana murmured aftet the kiss. “You know you're ruining the mode I had set myself in before we left.” Lana told him.

“I'm guessing that's a good thing, for me anyways.” Clark wondered.

“Clark.” Lana became serious. “This won't be easy.” Lana said as she made direct eye contact.

“I know, but I was hoping we could have dinner first.” Clark paused and smiled slightly. “Why waste a good dinner?” Clark questioned.

“Ok, let's eat.” Lana agreed, wanting more time to stall the inevitable.

The dinner was one that went by as slowly as they could make it. Taking time to just bask in the moment and the scenary of what was going on. Maybe more importantly, taking time look in each other's eyes and see exactly how happy this moment was for each of them. It was one of those moments where time had frozen around them and nothing was there, but them. But as time freezes in one moment, it must catch up and soon they found themselves at the exact moment, where the truth needed to be heard. Good or bad.

“Was it because of trust?” Was the first thing Lana needed to ask.

“No........It could never have been because of trust. Just because it's a secret doesn't mean that it can't be told because of a lack of trust. I would trust you with my life, with mother's life and with anything in this world. That's entirely how I felt every year and day I had to lie to you about the truth. If anything I trusted you too much. Just look at what happened the day of election that I had to turn back time. Lex went after you, because you knew the truth and because you wouldn't tell him the truth.” Clark paused shaking his head. “I know in my heart that even if there was a gun to your head, you would never tell and that's the problem. I didn't want you to have to die, because you were protecting my secret.” Clark tried to convince her.

“Ok.........” Lana paused in thought. “Then why couldn't you tell me the truth.” Lana face was serious.

“I just didn't want to bring you into this world Lana. Everyday I had to see my parents go through the stress of protecting me and my secret and I know that they said it was worth, but I can never shake the feeling that they didn't have to go through all of that. I didn't and I don't want to see you have to go through the same things, it isn't fair to you or was it fair to my parents. “ Clark explained to her his belief.

“Did you think I could handle the truth?” lana wanted to know.

“It isn't about that Lana.” Clark began to say.

“YES, it is about that Clark!” Lana emphatically responded and Clark turned away for a second.

“Lana, why does it matter if I believed that or not. The truth is that knowing my secret is dangerous, not to mention stressful and exhausting. I've everyone in my life whose known my secret go through that and shouldn't have to bet you too. Ok? I would think after everything you would realize that?” Clark raised his voice in an effort to get across the seriousness.

“It's always about protecting, isn't it?” Lana sarcastically questioned.

“That's what you do for the people you love. That's how I feel and you know that's what is in my heart. I love with all my heart and I couldn't go through life knowing that my secret did hurt you.” Clark's voice lowered to stress how much he believed what he was saying.

“I don't believe you.” Lana simply muttered and Clark looked to her in disbelief.

“What? How could say that you don't believe me? You really think that I would lie to you here? Is that the kind of person you're turning into now? The kind would just turn away a sincere explaination of my thoughts?” Lana didn't respond and Clark started again. “You can't answer? Dammit Lana, I'm trying to be open.” Clark said with effort.

“Then why don't you tell the truth?” Lana firmly said.

“Because I don't know what you're talking about and if you know what I'm keeping from you, then why don't you say it.” Clark challenged her and Lana stood up.

“You weren't protecting me, you were protecting yourself.” Lana pointed to him to emphasize her comment.

“Protecting myself?” Clark said shaking his head in confusion. “How was I protecting myself, I don't understand?” Clark was now baffled.

“Then tell me this. What were you more afraid of, me getting hurt or having to look yourself in the mirror every day and know that it was you fault?” Lana stood in waiting as Clark stared blankly ahead. “Yeah, I know.” Lana walked away as Clark stood still.

[basketballstar23]

oh gosh! That was so good! Dang this story is addicting lol PPMS! :)

[The Black Cat]

Fantastic update. I love this story!!

[SVsleuth]

Woah - somehow I had only read half of this chapter and must have gotten interrupted before I read the rest & got to reply. Sorry.

Clark seems to be trying really hard to be open with Lana. But maybe she actually knows him better than he knows himself.

Thanks for the chapter. PPMS!

[SmallvilleMan]

Happiest with you

“You know, I can't help but wonder.........if all those things I told myself......that knowing the truth about me would be too much for Lana to handle, if she knew my secret she'd be in danger ......what if I just made up all those excuses because I was scared?”

Those were the words that he had used when talking to his mother the day of Lana and Lex's wedding. His very own words and yet when Lana said those things to him, he became defensive, as if they were an insult or maybe it was just the truth. After all, that's what they were trying to get at here, the truth.

Yet this paritcular truth was very hard to stomach. He wasn't wrong though, was he? He had seen so many people get hurt because of his secret and so many times there have been people who have come after the people he loves, because of that. That was the truth and just because they weren't successful, doesn't mean that they hadn't come to close to destroying everything that he held close. This wasn't game, was life or death and he it never seem fair to bring her or anyone else into that world. Then, suddenly, her question reappeared in his mind.

Was he really afraid of the guilt? That was a question he really had to think about and it was going to take all night.

Sleep wasn't easy for Lana as she laid her face on her hands in the hotel room bed. Consciously laying her body on one side of the bed as if Clark was right next to her as she wondered if what she had said was rigtt, even if it was the truth.

She knew it was indeed true that he was in his mind protecting her from the evils or hardships that came with knowing his secret. She wasn't blind to what had been right in front of her face. All the times that it seemed they found themselves in trouble as did the Kents and Chloe or Pete when he was here. Most of all, the look Clark seemed to always have on his face during those moments, seemingly sinking in the blame and taking what had happened all on his shoulders.

In a way, that is part of why she loved him. He was always so willingly to take the blame upon himself and spare everyone else the burden. He cared so much about everyone else that it didn't seem to matter if he suffered as long as everyone else was free from it. Even if that seemed to eat him up inside, as she could see through the look in his eyes, which had always found a way of reflecting his inner feelings.

Thinking about all of this almost made her angry that she could challenge him on that belief. Yet, going back to that conversation they had in the Talon, the day Clark came back from Metropolis that summer, it seemed right. He had never seemed to understand that all this protecting did was hurt her and himself. She didn't want any part of a protection that lead her away from the man she loved and he had never seemed to understand that. It was as if he was always so blinded by the fact that she had to be protected or saved and even though she knows everything she does now, she still respond to him the way she had that afternoon at the Talon.

Clark silently opened the door to the room as the sun shined through the curtins of the room. He shut the door softly, in hopes of not waking Lana, who had finally managed to dooze off for a bit.

Still in his clothes from last night, he sat in the chair across from the bed and slowly removed them all, before slipping into bed. He laid sideways facing her, as if unsure of what to do. After a fight it wasn't always easy to get in snuggled position. As the saying goes, “Hell hath no fury like a women's scorn.”

So, Clark's hand rested at it's side. That was until Lana took it upon herself to snuggle right into Clark and place his hand around her waist. “No matter what has happened during the day. I always want us to end this way. Deal?” Lana whispered with her eyes still close.

“Deal.” Clark agreed a small smile piercing both of their faces.

Clark groaned as he squinted his eyes open, before becoming wide awake as he felt the air beneath his arms. He turned to the clock and noticed it was still rather early. At least for vacation time anyways. Before he could register anymore concern for anything that could have happened, the door opened and Lana walked in, looking rather exhausted. “Up so soon?” She took a seat the door to remove her sweaty socks and shoes.

“I didn't feel anything in my arms, kind of woke me up.” Clark replied.

“Oh, well I thought I could use a good workout to keep my mind fresh and to shrug off any cog wegs that morning brings.” Lana explained and Clark nodded. “I probably should go shower.” Lana said, some what awkwardly.

“Lana.........Wait.” Clark got out of bed as Laan turned to him. “Maybe you were right, maybe I was only protecting myself.” Clark confessed.

“Do you remember the day in the Talon, when you came back from Metropolis?” Lana questioned and Clark nodded. “So do I, I've thought about it since I knew we were going to discuess your secret.” Lana paused again. “And do you remember what I said when you told me you were just trying to protect me?” Lana wanted to know.

“You said, the only thing that keeps hurting me, is you.” Clark quoted, obviously a quote that had stuck in his mind. “How could I forget?” Clark painfully said.

“And do you know why that was?” Lana needed to know his answer to this question, because this was the problem Clark had always had with her.

“Because of my secret and what happened in Metropolis.” Clark answered exactly as Lana thought he would.

“No.” She whispered and took his hands. “You hurt me, because you kept pushing me away from the one thing that meant the most to me in this world. You. That's why it hurt all those times.” Lana let him into heart, something she knows should have been done long ago.

“I just can't bare the thought of you hurt.” Clark murmured, emotions feeling his body.

“What hurts the most is being without you. Just look what happened when you told me that you didn't love me. I was destroyed. Nothing hurts more than the hits you can take to the heart. I just wish you would have understood that.” Lana looked sympathically up to Clark.

“I guess I do now. It was just so hard making the choice and then having to deal with the consequences of that choice.” Clark tried to convince her.

“Just look at it this way Clark. You've always said that all you wanted was for me to be happy. I'm happiest with you and that's what I told you that day in the hospital when you died.” Lana extended her hands, emotion taking her over. “I love you and I want to love every part of you. It's just a matter of you letting me.” Lana said in a pleading tone.

“Are you sure.....” Lana rolled her eyes at his comment and brought him into a deep kiss. “I'll take that as a yes.” Clark finally broke a smile.

“I want you to be able to tell me anything and have it be easy. I don't have the abilities you do, but when it comes you and what you do. I promise i'll have the ability to love and support you, no matter what. Let me do that.” Lana offered with a warm look.

“I don't......” Clark begin to say and took his face in her hands.

“But I want to be that to you. You don't have to be strong for both of us, we're a team. Lean on me, I want to take that burden off of you, because it's ours. When one of us is hurt, so is the other. You're not alone.” Lana tried to reassure him.

“And what do I do to deserve this?” Clark wondered.

“More than you'll ever know.” Lana winked before bringing him into another kiss. “Now if you'll let me shower.” Lana walked to the bathroom, before seeing Clark apppear in front of her.

“You said we were a team, right?” Clark now completely in the nude. “Well teams do things together and Miss. Lang, I can't let you go into this shower alone.” Clark grinned and Lana shook her with a bright smile.

“Now look what I've done.” Clark brought Lana into another kiss before shutting the door.

[basketballstar23]

Ah just the update i was looking for! another great one SVM! :)

[CaptainObvious]

Great story! Every unsolved question, look of sadness, frustration or uncertainty between the both of them is coming to pass one by one. They seem to be forming a stronger bond than ever! This fic is like the ultimate flashback of sorts. Post soon please!

[SmallvilleMan]

I'm going to aim for Saturday........Hopefully my readers will still be here after the finale........No need to throw in the towel when we're almost done;) Don't be like Al and Miles:rolleyes:

[basketballstar23]

where have you been SVM? Looking forward to that update! PPMS!

[SVsleuth]

Harry, I finally read your last chapter. Love how you're having them resolve things. I like the part about the reason Clark was hurting Lana was because he was keeping her from the one person that could make her happiest - him. That's a good insight. I wish they had brought that out on the show. Clark was so busy trying to protect Lana from being hurt by others, that he failed to realize that what hurt her most was being separated from him, & kept out of his life. I'm glad they are finally talking and coming to understand one another better.

Yep, he gets it - she wants to share EVERYTHING with him - so of course he was glad to share the shower... She may find now that she can't get rid of him, even if she wanted to.

PPMS! Don't stop when you're so close to the end.

[basketballstar23]

Ppms! :)

[Jephael]

I just spent the last several minutes reading this entire story, and I really enjoyed it! I can't help but wonder though if there's gonna be any kinda "saving the day" type action at some point.

[SmallvilleMan]

About Us

“I just want to remember this moment.” Those were the words that he uttered to her as they laid in bed together the morning after spending the night making love. If you could any call it that, considering who she had sex with. That moment, more than any other, had burden her for every second, since she had found out the truth. Not based on the fact that she had sex with him, but because he had stolen their moment. He had stolen the moment years ago, when Clark, the real Clark had said to her before she had left for Lex's wedding. That was their moment and now it was gone.

“Lana?” Clark questioned, his eyes searching hers for an answer. After everything that had just happened in the morning, it all had seemed to gone away at night. Just like everyone else who had face a long road ahead of them, the journey had tired them. They had given everything so far and yet, that meant nothing, if they couldn't get over this last hurtle. This last thing that could easily tear them apart, if they would let it.

“I just don't know how to apologize.” Lana mumbled as Clark looked on, knowing exactly what she was talking. Yet unable to say anything comforting.

“And I don't how to ask such a question.........I don't know how this could of happened, but I've never felt a worse pain in this world.” Clark softly replied as he tried to catch his heart from falling.

“He was exactly like you....” Lana started, before trailing off.

“Except he wasn't.” Clark quickly reminded her, a hint of anger rising in his voice.

“I know that, it's just that when he was there it seemed like everything was finally coming together between us. Like a dream come true.” Lana regretfully told him as he looked away, unable to look at her.

“What am I suppose to say to that?” Clark paused and turned back to her. “Oh Clark, the girl you've loved the entire life had the time of her life with someone who is a copy of you and is a phatom.” Clark mimicked.

“I didn't mean to hurt, I would never hurt you.” Lana said in a pleading tone.

“Hurt? I wish I could describe the feeling in my heart after finding out what happened, as just hurt. I wish there was a word in the universe that could describe the feeling that I have. Hurt can't even justify it.” Clark firmly responded, the anger clear in his voice as Lana looked down weakly.

“I thought he was you, I don't know what else to say.” Lana repeated, at a loss.

“Say, how could do this to me? How you could rip out my heart like this?” Then Clark paused, as if a thought had hit him. “Just tell me the truth, am I the guy you want?“ Clark gulped at that question, as if afraid to ask.

Lana looked up at him, her eyes catching his and a sense of strength seemingly shooting up her spine. “You're the guy I've always wanted.” Lana calmly responded.

“Yet you fell in love with that thing and Lex.” Clark paused to gather his thoughts. “It's just I feel that I don't even know you anymore part of the time. It's like you're changing and changing, so I question if those changes have changed your love of me and if I'm really the guy you want.” Clark explained.

“You're right, I did fall in love with Lex and with that thing or at least I thought I did. Yet, there's a difference between the love I felt for them and the true love I feel for you.” Lana saw Clark's eyes unbelieveing. “I know how that sounds, but I know in my heart that it's true. Love is no different than anything else in this world. It can be manufactored and twisted by reality. I feel in love with Lex, because he brought me into a manufactored world, that he twisted with his lies and his money. The same thing with your other half. They fooled me into thinking that their world was real and that what they had was what I really wanted.” Lana paused for a second to catch his glaze. “You don't fool me, you just get me yourself, your heart and all you ever care about is protecting me, no matter what it means to you. That's real, you can't fake what we feel in our hearts. The way we can look each other in the eye and know exactly what we're feeling. That's true love” Lana said, with all the emotion she could gather.

“If you believe all of that, how could have lied about Lex and kidnapped Lionel? How could you risk breaking us apart for them?” Clark changed subjects slightly.

“I wanted revenge.” Lana whispered as she turned her head slighty.

“Revenge?” Clark shook his head. “You couldn't have talked to me about this?” Clark needed to know.

“And you couldn't have talked to me about Lex or Lionel? Dammit Clark, you think everything that happens in the past stays in the past. You can't even turn your head for a second to realize that this stuff still means something. You think that you can't recognize me sometimes? How do you think I feel every time I look in the mirror and think i'm looking at a stranger?” Lana paused as her eyes looked blankly away. “I feel like i'm dying inside Clark.” Lana weakly said.

“Lana?” Clark questioned with a look of horror.

“Every since the day of your dad's election, I feel like I've been losing a part of myself. Everything from seeing you look at me without an ounce of hope to the day you told me you didn't love me and then everything with Lex as well as Lionel. Even everything that happened with you and Chloe. Life had gotten so complicated and hard, that I turned around for one second, then I was gone. I had wished that being with you was going to turn everything around and I could find that part of me that I had loss, but I didn't. All I did was bring you into a life with someone that you don't even know and complicate someone's life who has enough of that.” Lana's barely peaked up at Clark, as if unable to lift her head.

“I just don't understand why you can't open up to me like this before. I mean I know that I've been that way, but that's just the way I've always been. You know that as well as I do.” Clark paused somewhat frustrated. “It's just that you've always been able to, even when you were with Lex or anyone else. I want to be able to be there for you, because that's what people who love each other do. There must be something more to this.” Clark tried to urge Lana to open up.

“The simple truth is, I don't want you taking on my burdens for me.” Lana paused and threw up her hands. “Even if you don't believe this, I know that one day you're going to save the world and I've never been certain that I've ever fit in that world.” Lana paused to look at him in his face. “And I know some where deep down inside, that you agree with that.” Lana confessed.

“Lana, I don't know where my destiny is going to lead me, but.......” Clark began to argue, before Lana stopped him.

“Clark, please don't start with that. I know that my knowledge of much I know you has been put in question, but the truth is that I know this much about you. You're not the kind of person to stand on the sidelines and I've always thought this, you're meant for much more than this. We've all tried to run from our destiny at points in our life, but we can't run from who we are.” Lana emphasized the last part.

“I don't care about whatever is in store for me. I'll handle that when it comes to that. I care about us.” Clark stayed on the subject hand.

“So do I.”

“Then I guess the question is, what can we do.” Clark stared down into Lana's eyes. “All I know is that I don't want to spend the rest of my life wondering what could have been and I don't want to bring you into a world where I can't give you all of me.” Clark concluded.

“And don't want to hold you back nor do I want to spend the rest of my life with any other guy. “ Lana repeated Clark's statement and Clark turned to his bag.

“Our flight's tonight and I know a nice place, right near our gate. If you come, then I promise to do everything in my power to keep us together, no matter where destiny leads. If you don't.” Clark stopped, the thought unbearable to think. “Then I love you and I'll always love you.” Clark grabbed his bag, as if unable to say anything. “I'm going to pack.” Clark turned away from her as she tried to collect her thoughts.

[SVsleuth]

Ooo... so much still going on here, so much still needs to heal. And yet, they both want each other so much, NEED each other.

Thanks for the update, Harry. Can't wait for the last night of the trip.

I like how you show the reality of a real relationship. Love isn't all happiness & bliss. It often involves working through deep emotions and being honest with one another, even if it hurts. And then accepting one another, in spite of each one's faults, and moving ahead together.

Awaiting more, even as I get the vibe that this fic is nearing its end. PPMS!

[zeba-el]

I just started to reading this fic today and I think it is a quality piece of writing keep up the good work!!

[basketballstar23]

wow that was great! i know i'm a little late but like that stupid cliche' says better late than never right?! lol

PPMS! =)

[SmallvilleMan]

You're right, better late then never........Second or last part coming soon.

[SVsleuth]

:)

[zeba-el]

I hope it is a happy clana ending

[SmallvilleMan]

One More Day

It seemed that during every big decision a person could make, they would look toward the past. It was if they were searching for a reason to hold on and not let go. Lana had been no different. She had always looked to the past to guide her into a decision, especially when it came to Clark. After all, it always been easy to forget all the great things Clark had done and all the times he made her feel special. Except, there was no point in looking back to the past tonight, it had all been taken in, especially with everything that had happened during this trip. The only thoughts that consumed her head were thoughts of the future.

She sat on the park bench in front of the a small lake, gazing into it, as if it could provide some answers. Which is no different from the way anyone else would. It's times like these, where a person looks for anything that could save them the heartache and or pain of searching for answer that could destroy them forever. Of course she thought of calling Chloe, just to see her thoughts, but why bother? She already knew them, they had been over this a million times and there was Nell. Who, well, really couldn't understand the situation and frankly, had always kind of been anti-Clark. All she wanted was a fresh view point, to put her own thoughts into a clear picture.

“Mind if I sit down?” This old lady asked, knocking Lana out of her state of thought. Lana just nodded slightly, hoping to slip back into her thinking coma. However, the old lady, who had brought a small brown bag with her to feed the ducks, seemed interested in Lana's current state of mind. “If you don't mind me asking.........What's a beautiful girl like you doing here in the middle of this park on a day like today?” The old lady questioned, with an innocent smile, one, that you couldn't be mad at if you tried.

“Just thinking.” Lana replied quickly, still caught up in thought.

“So, what's his name?” The old lady asked, catching on to the situation. Lana turned to her, almost with a guilty face. “It's ok, I'm just an old lady. I don't mean to bother you, it's just I use to have that face you have on right now and I can remember sitting in the same spot, years ago. Maybe I can help.” The old lady tried to reason.

“Do you believe that two people aren't meant to be together? That there are certain forces in this world that makes things happen, call it destiny.” Lana blurted out as the old lady looked on.

“Destiny is just a word honey. “ The old smiled softly, before continuing. “And people meaning or aren't meaning to be together is just a silly catch phrase used in movies. You shouldn't be stressing or worrying about such things like that. They just don't mean anything. All they are is used as excuses or foolish reasons to do or not do something.” The old lady explained to Lana.

“What makes you say that?” Lana wondered aloud.

“Because I use to think that way to and that's why I am, where I am today.” She paused in thought. “I use to be in love with a high ranking official in the government. He was the smartest, most handsome and kind man I ever met. Always trying to help people, always trying to save the day and do the right thing. Not unlike his father, who use to be a police man and marry one of the nicest ladies I ever encounter.” She paused again, caught in the moment. “After, a lot of built up passion, we finally came together and spent all of high school together, then came college. As he began to become part of the government, especially in the higher ranking offices of the government, he became more enclosed. The government is a very secretive place and that place became him. He would keep secrets from me and I could see it wearing down on him, on us. We get in arguments all the time and I began to feel like I couldn't be trusted, despite his warnings it was only for my protection. Finally, we decided that we needed to take a trip, get away from everything. So we did, we went to Paris, the place of love, as some have called it. It was here, that we decided we needed to make a choice. Either I could accept the life that the government would lead or we could end it.” The old lady stopped, unable to finish. The stress on her tone starting to show.

“And you had to end it?” Lana assumed and the lady nodded.

“Yes........” She trailed off in a sad manner, but began again. “I never told him this, but I thought I was holding him back and that's why I walked away.” The old lady confessed.

“How could you be holding him back?” Lana needed to know.

“Because if I was there then he wouldn't have been the man I know he could have been. He would be worrying about me all the time and holding the weight of those secrets on his shoulders. I didn't want to put him in that position, where he always had to choice between wife and job.” The old lady tried to convince Lana.

“I understand, sounds very familar.” Lana said, the tone in her voice sadden by that conclusion. The same one she had just made onto herself.

“Anyways, that's what I had thought.” She mentioned, as she picked on Lana's reference to familarity.

“What do you mean?” Lana wanted to know.

“What I mean is that what use to believe or what I had made myself believe. The real true was, that I was afraid that I couldn't be the person he needed me to be. The one who could be strong for him, when every other second he had to be strong for others.” The lady paused as if to emphasize her next words. “Believe me when I say that fear is the only thing that holds girls like us back. It isn't about wondering if we're choosing the right guy or if we really do love him, because we already made that choice long ago. It's about overcoming out fear with the love we have for them and to become that hero in the dark, because whether you realize it or not, they need us as much as everyone else needs them.” The old lady carefullly and cooley detailed for Lana, for now sat there in a trance.

Not another word was said both, as there had been enough said. Some people, unlike others, know when it's time to just be quiet. The old lady turned from Lana and began to feed the ducks, with the popcorn in her brown bag.

Clark fiddled with the straw in his glass as he tried to block out the negative thoughts of what could happen. However, despite his best efforts he couldn't shake off those thoughts of what it could be like without the girl he loved. Not something anyone in the world could do without having it written all over her face.

“Must be a girl.......” An older looking bartender gave a friendly smirk as Clark eyes glazed up to the man. “Sorry to bother you, call me a softy, but I just feel for guys with that look.” The bartender told Clark.

“Thanks......” Clark said with a soft tone.

“Must be a special one too. Not a lot of guys like you would be sitting here of all places. We usually get those guys.” The bartender points to old to middle age men sitting at tables spread around the bar.

“Just my first and only love.......I'm kind of hoping she would be my last.” Clark nodded slowly.

“Sounds like something out of a fairy tale. The only question is why isn't she here with you now. I mean, like I just said, you aren't the typical guy who would be sitting like this at the bar.” The bartender stopped for politeness. “If you don't mind me asking.” He leaned on the counter toward Clark.

“I guess you could say my life is complicated.” Clark simple replied.

“Believe it not, I understand. I was actually a high ranking offcial in the government and trust me, doesn't get more complicated than that.” The bartender paused in memory. “I had a girl much like you describe yours, my first love and I was hoping my last. However, it seemed like my job wouldn't allow it. We would get into fights about my secrets and just about things in general.....” He started to trail off at the end, almost not wanting to finish.

“So what did you do?” Clark's attention had now rised.

“I closed myself up, even when I was able to be truthful with her, it seemed that I was still being close. I couldn't let her be with me completely, because I could never let her in completely. I placed the burden on myself and we even tried to take a trip away from everything, to fix it. It was then we made the choice to break apart, forever.” The man informed Clark.

“Because you had a destiny to fulfill?” Clark asked as he stared into space at the question.

“No, destiny is something we have inside of us. Our destiny never takes away from anything, because we are our own destiny.” He paused to make this part clear. “My fault was not realizing that she was the reason for my destiny. She made me that person and was the one who would keep me that person forever.” He paused with a smile shrug. “I hate to use a superhero anaolgy, but she was the reason I kept getting up. It never seemed right without her and that's why I'm here.” He concluded and Clark turned to him, with a slight nod. “Let me get you another glass.” He took Clark's glass and filled it up , once again.

As it began to get later, it seemed like time was turning faster than Clark would run. Every time he would look up, another hour would be gone and his flight approached. Then it happened.

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While youre far away dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure

His head slowly turned from side to side and watched as one by one, everyone in the bar left.

Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
Cause Id miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
Id still miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing

Sadness began to creep over him as he felt the eyes of pity from the bartender, who just turned away at his glance.

Lying close to you feeling your heart beating
And Im wondering what youre dreaming
Wondering if its me youre seeing
Then I kiss your eyes
And thank God were together
I just want to stay with you in this moment forever
Forever and ever

Everything from his eyes to feet suddenly became heavier, as he tried to brace himself.

Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
Cause Id miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
Id still miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing

He looked at the clock one more time, hoping that it would turn back. Even if it only turned back for one more minute. That's all he really wanted, just one more minute of hope, but there was none.

I dont want to miss one smile
I dont want to miss one kiss
I just want to be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just want to hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And just stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time

The border call for their plane or should he say his plane was called. He picked up his bags, but was unable to turn away. He closed his eyes, hoping this was just a nightmare.Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
Cause Id miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
Id still miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing

"Clark......" His eyes popped open, but he was still unable to turn around. Still chained to the floor by the thoughts of such a horrible nightmare.

Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
I dont want to miss a thing

Finally, with all his strength, he turned and there she was. "Lana...." He whispered out and she smiled warmly at him. He couldn't wait another second, he or should it be they, broke out of their invisible chains, once and for all.

----- Added 1 Minutes later -----

the End

[SVsleuth]

Aw...The End. Well, it seems they finally made the choice to stay together. After everything they worked through, it all comes down to the fact that neither of them wants to live without the other.

Thanks for this wonderful story, Harry.
Have a great summer. :)

[zeba-el]

This has been a great fic and it is sad to see it come to a end.

And YeY they choose to be together.

[basketballstar23]

I absolutely loved how it ended. It was really fantastic SVM. I enjoyed reading the whole time. Awesome job =)

[#7superherofan]

Great story!!! The ending was so suspenseful, 'cause I wasn't sure for a minute if this would be a happy-ever after Clark/Lana story. LOVE THAT SONG!!!!